View Full Version : So frustrated
01-17-2008, 08:02 PM
I'm sorry, but I really need to vent right now....
I've been teaching for a few years now and I really enjoy. I have come across some children and parents who were challenging and it has not bothered me so much as it does today.
I care about what goes on with my students when they leave my classroom. Some of them come from unstable homes and other situations that are really heartbreaking, you know. Other students come from "normal" homes and that's fine too.
What gets me so annoyed is when I am trying to help children who sincerely need some sort of intervention or services for whatever reason (being emotional, pyschological, behavioral, or whatever) and the parent/guardian blames everyone else (especially the teacher)for the child's issues/problems. How is this child going to grow up and take responsibility for what he/she does if the parent is a master of blaming others. It just gets me sooooo mad and angry sometimes. If it wasn't for the fact that I love to teach, I think I would have given up on this profession long ago. I mean it's a known fact that most teachers with less than five years of experience leave the field because of lack of support from supervisors/administration, or general frustration with the students & their parents.
Again, I'm sorry to bring this here, but I really needed to get it off my chest....thanks for listening...
01-17-2008, 08:30 PM
PLEASE don't give up,We need caring teachers like you in our system.I worked as a classroom assistant for 8 years (grade 1) and know how hard it is when parents won't do what is best for the child.We had many problem children in our classroom:hair:swear at you ,Hit you ,set their homes on fire,You name we had it.Parents just don't get it.It should be LAW that every parent should spend a certain number of hours in the classroom to see just how their child acts in school.But of course most don't give a sh#t anyway.The kids are out of there hair for the day.All you can do is try and intervene and sometimes it works and sometime it doesn't.But remember there are children out there that will remember you and thank you some day for what you did.
So VENT:hair::waah::!!!::eyes: all you want I HEAR YA
01-17-2008, 08:39 PM
Oh i forgot here's a:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
01-17-2008, 08:44 PM
I'm finishing up my degree so I can go into the teaching field, so I hear you. I have two teenagers who, I know, would not be the students they are without my husband and I being so involved and interested. It's so sad to me to see other children who don't have people in their lives who cares what happens in their classes.
Thanks for being interested and involved in your students' lives. I've seen teachers who don't care (hard to believe, but true).
Hang in there!:hug:
01-17-2008, 08:52 PM
And people wonder why I quit teaching.
Vent away, we all need that sometimes.
01-17-2008, 09:28 PM
I've always been an involved parent. My youngest is a senior in HS now. I've seen (in public & private schools) the impact that good and not-so-good teachers have made in my two children.
Thank you for being a loving, concerned, involved teacher. :hug:
You will surely never know the impact you're making in your students lives, but it is there.
All schools need more like you. :thumbsup:
BTW - A teacher neighbor of mine had a bumper sticker that read, "If you can read this, thank a teacher." Maybe you should make it your signature.
01-17-2008, 09:37 PM
:hug: Thanks everyone for your support and kindness. I appreciate the fact that there are people who do respect the job that teachers do on a daily basis.
:grphug: :hug: :grphug:
01-17-2008, 10:43 PM
I so know where you're coming from! :hug:
01-17-2008, 10:45 PM
Though I do not teach, it irritates me to no end that there are so many parents that refuse to accept responsibility for their child/ren! They would rather blame schools or television, or video games than face the fact they are lacking, as a parent. I don't know if some people realize the importance of being actively involved in their child's life. It just baffles me when people have kids but don't want the responsibility of having kids.
It is so good to know that you are a truly caring teacher...Kids do remember that. I know there are a few teachers I've had in my life that I'll never forget.
01-17-2008, 10:58 PM
I work with troubled kids, and I have to say that there are parents who have bent over backwards to try to keep their kids on the right path, and there are others who've taught their kids through their actions/non actions.
I do know that the kids, no matter how awful, do appreciate the consistence and caring of the staff they spend much of their time with. All my students have been diagnosed with some sort of psychiatric/emotional/behavioral problems, and even though they may not behave well in school at all, I know that they appreciate the time I spend being there everyday, talking to them like they're normal human beings, and being willing to joke with them and have their jokes appreciated.
So even though there are limits to what you can do to help a lot of these kids outside the classroom--remember that just seeing you smile when they walk into the class every day makes a HUGE difference in their childhood. (Even when you want to crawl under the desk because they showed up. :teehee:)
I mean it's a known fact that most teachers with less than five years of experience leave the field because of lack of support from supervisors/administration, or general frustration with the students & their parents.
Being a New Sub, I see the kids you mean, and being a Sub, I do not have the pull a FT teacher would have if I see something to be concerned about.
It makes me crazy that the kids my daughters complain about are the same kids I see acting up in class when they are 'subjected' to a Sub.
Thank You for saying what is going on, you are one of the good guys.
01-18-2008, 04:18 AM
I went back to my high school to thank the teacher that made a difference in my life. Please stick to it. I know you are making a difference in at least one child's life. When my teacher's father died. our entire class who loved him so much showed up to the funeral becuase he was so great. we voted him teacher of the year and when he didn't win. we were so upset, we ordered him his own trophy and had it engraved teacher of the year. so please know that student do see and appreciate the good teachers. there are not many good teachers out there and you are obvously one of them. please stay. :muah: :muah: :muah: :muah:
01-18-2008, 04:39 AM
Angel4ever, don't give up!There are many that will always remember their teacher. It sounds like you really care about these kids and maybe you're one of a few people who do, so i'm sure you're making a difference! Before we came to Israel, my father used to teach in a technology college in Moscow and he had some guys there from really broken homes and with behavioral problems. And somehow they changed in his class and were coming later to thank him for what he taught them. I hope there will be more teachers like you and him :thumbsup:
01-18-2008, 06:40 AM
I never understood how parents could react that way either. It is sad. They blame everyone, everything, except the true problem: themselves.
I guess in a way it is denial. Denial that they could ever be less than perfect in any aspect of life.
I was a Girl Scout leader for years. I worked closely with my daughters and was active within their schools, classrooms and participated in many of their activities.
I came across parents like this so many times.
I hope you never give up teaching based on the few. It can be hard to keep going, but try to focus on those who really do care, who really do try, rather than the few who don't and won't.
01-18-2008, 10:35 AM
:hug: hang in there...your students need ya!! :hug:
01-18-2008, 02:17 PM
I fully understand. I have many a retired/active teacher in my family, and I myself work with kids who are "in the system".
The parents I deal with day in and day out are....to say the least, frustrating. It seems 90% have a goal in life that is solely to keep their child from understanding action=consequence, whether good or bad.
I have to constantly remind myself that the people I deal with daily are not the norm, that addicted parents, jailed/prisoned parents, etc, are not what goes on in "normal" society.
We do the jobs that we do so that 1 out of a million people we deal with....we might just make a difference (ok I exaggerate, but that's how it can feel).
Just remember that you do what you can, you try to provide the services/structure/support/caring that you believe the child needs, and hope that one day it will be received with gratitude. Don't get down, sometimes those kids/parents don't respond now, but they will remember. One day what you have said/offered might click.
I've had kids come back/call years later and say, "I remember what you said/did and it didn't do anything, but I know now that you were right/helpful/caring, and that means something to me now."
KH is a great place to vent, and all can empathize, and many can relate!!! :muah: You are not alone in you frustration.
01-18-2008, 02:26 PM
You guys are the best! Thank you so much for all your support. Yesterday was just a bad day for me. I'm pretty much over it now. I can only do what I have been doing. I know that there are parents & some students who appreciate the job that I do, so for that I am truly appreciative and thankful.
Thanks again guys! :grphug: :grphug: :grphug:
01-20-2008, 08:09 PM
I see parents like that in stores, on the street, around the neighborhood. Called Children's Protective Services on one...
Vent away, love, vent away. MOST parents DO support and appreciate you.
While you may or may not agree with corporeal punishment, this might tickle your funny bone. When my daughter was young, I explained that I spanked her when she was really bad because I wanted her to grow up to be a good person, to know how to act right around people--kids who acted up at school were never very happy people were they? I didn't like doing it, but I spanked her because I cared how she turned out. At age 13 while we were in a store a young boy was throwing a screaming stomping fit...dear daughter turned to me and said, "His Momma doesn't love him enough--she doesn't spank him." The lesson on discipline as part of parental love had stuck with her.