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View Full Version : 17 plus one more on the way!!!


mwhite
05-09-2008, 02:11 PM
Did anyone happen to catch the "Today" show this morning and the family of 17 children with one more on the way? My dear husband asked me if she worked.....:roll:

Karina
05-09-2008, 02:24 PM
I did not see the show. Have seen shows about families that have 14 or 16 + children and in this country it usually ends up with the local council having to find them a home big enough for them to live in and the older children end up looking after the younger ones.
I don't think that is anything wrong with having a large family as long as you can afford it without relying on others to support you and you have to be able to give children time and love and individual attention. I can't see how you can do that with 17 children. I at times feel stretched with just 3.

The families I have seen documented on the TV relied heavily on the older children to look after the young ones. They are essentially bringing up children that the parents decided to have. There was a radio show recently that had a phone in about this subject. and quite a few of the people that phoned that came from larger than average families say 7-8 children and above decided not to have any children of their own. Some felt they had done their part by helping to raise their siblings. I think that is pretty sad.

mwhite
05-09-2008, 03:09 PM
I agree, if you love kids and can afford them, go for it! They all looked happy and healthy.

bailsmom
05-09-2008, 04:19 PM
Did anyone happen to catch the "Today" show this morning and the family of 17 children with one more on the way? My dear husband asked me if she worked.....:roll:


:roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard:

Jan in CA
05-09-2008, 04:37 PM
:shock: I think I know which family it is although I can't think of their name. I've seen shows on TV about how they all work together and stuff. :thumbsup:

stitchwitch
05-09-2008, 04:40 PM
My husband said they need another hobby. I think past 8 kids it becomes rather strange. What exactly is the purpose of having 17 kids? Is it birth control by pregnancy? If it is, it isn't working. I don't get it and it's a little creepy to me. Like the ads for pesticides that say "a blah blah blah lays 1000 eggs a year" or whatever.
My dad was the oldest of 6 kids, his comments always were that he was the dad to the 5 younger siblings. He fed them, clothed them and when he was old enough to work he supported them. I feel sorry for him, some of the stories he's told are heartbreaking. I don't think any child should have to be a father figure to kids only a few years younger. Mind you, he's 75 so times may have changed but I doubt being one in 17 kids you really get the attention or support you need. Just my opinion.

Jan in CA
05-09-2008, 04:43 PM
I found them. Here's a link.
http://health.discovery.com/convergence/duggars/duggarfamily.html

Ivy19
05-09-2008, 04:56 PM
I found them. Here's a link.
http://health.discovery.com/convergence/duggars/duggarfamily.html

Thanks for the link. I've seen these people on a few tv programs. All their kids have names that start with a "J." I think Mrs. Dugger needs to change her name to "Just Say NO!":p

Karina
05-09-2008, 05:07 PM
I am wondering if they get paid to appear on these programme. Is that how they can afford all these children.

mwhite
05-09-2008, 05:15 PM
My husband said they need another hobby. I think past 8 kids it becomes rather strange. What exactly is the purpose of having 17 kids? Is it birth control by pregnancy? If it is, it isn't working. I don't get it and it's a little creepy to me. Like the ads for pesticides that say "a blah blah blah lays 1000 eggs a year" or whatever.
My dad was the oldest of 6 kids, his comments always were that he was the dad to the 5 younger siblings. He fed them, clothed them and when he was old enough to work he supported them. I feel sorry for him, some of the stories he's told are heartbreaking. I don't think any child should have to be a father figure to kids only a few years younger. Mind you, he's 75 so times may have changed but I doubt being one in 17 kids you really get the attention or support you need. Just my opinion.

They did have a schedule/chart for "One on One Time With Mom"!

mwhite
05-09-2008, 05:17 PM
I found them. Here's a link.
http://health.discovery.com/convergence/duggars/duggarfamily.html


They also mentioned that they were employed by "Discovery Channel" so yeah, I do believe they get paid for being on the programs. Probably have agents, too.

Karina
05-09-2008, 05:31 PM
So what are they breeding for money?.

stitchwitch
05-09-2008, 05:56 PM
They did have a schedule/chart for "One on One Time With Mom"!

That's just jacked up. To have to schedule an appointment. "oh, ok honey, I'll pencil you in for next Thursday!!". Weird. I gotta say, my parents weren't the best but I didn't have to schedule an appointment to have time with them. :hmm: I guess it all comes down to what each person feels is right. If they feel breeding like that is right then so be it, not my call or privilege to tell them how to raise their "family" if you can call it that. To me it's more like an assembly line or business. :ick:

Cynamar
05-09-2008, 09:35 PM
Crazy. Wonder if they've figured out what's causing it?

mwhite
05-09-2008, 09:41 PM
:shrug: :teehee:

SteveDallas
05-09-2008, 09:52 PM
I saw it on my way out the door to work. I don't know if they mentioned it on the Today show, but my wife did a bit of googling and found they're adherents of the Quiverfull movement. They don't believe in using any form of birth control (including natural family planning).

Cynamar
05-09-2008, 10:11 PM
I would be praying for menopause.

annomalley
05-10-2008, 08:38 AM
This woman's been pregnant for about 2/3 of her adult life. :noway:

Inis
05-10-2008, 09:06 AM
My dad came from a family of 16 kids. My grandparents were ex-Amish (is that a word?) and were very - cough - fruitful.
It was the older kids taking care of the younger ones. My dad was the youngest boy and was raised primarily by his older sisters.
They had a big farm in Pennsylvania and put those kids to work. Everytime they needed more room, they just added on to the farmhouse. It was such a neat, warm, homey house. It was great place to visit as a kid.

Family reunions with uncles, aunts, cousins, cousins' kids are just huge and loads of fun. My grandmother's funeral was held in the firehouse in town because it was the only place that could hold everyone.

All that said, I'm so glad we have birth control now. :teehee:

Cynamar
05-10-2008, 09:09 AM
Amen to that! Thank you, God, for birth control!

iza
05-10-2008, 09:10 AM
Coming from Quebec, where families of 10+ children used to be the norm, it's not really all that weird to me. Celine Dion, for instance, is the youngest of 14 children. But in the 60-70s everything changed, and we now have a very low birth rate.

What I find weird is to have a TV show about it. My grandmother would find that hysterical. But she would probably say that with the house they have, with all their storage space, and with freezers and pantries full of food, it wouldn't be that hard. ;)

figaro
05-10-2008, 09:23 AM
I really want to know how he supports his family! In a newspaper article today, it says that he is a former member of Arkansas Legislature and was not specific about how he supports his family, something about how he was guided by a seminar some 20 odd years ago and it blends finances and religion?? I do think that while they probably do get paid for their shows, it does not really "support them". Whatever business he is in, he has been supporting his family before the Discovery Channel came to them and has since. I know that they were able to build themselves a custom built house without the channels help.

Personally, I think that they are both crazy!:eyes: I have 4, one in college and 3 little ones at home and there is no way I could have more!

vaknitter
05-10-2008, 09:37 AM
I breifly saw this as I was going off to work. Personally wonder how that woman's body can tolerate so many pregnancies without complications. Seeing their clothing and hearing about the strict gender roles in the house, I wonder if they are fundamenalists. I would wager to guess that one person (the father) with a standard 8-5 job cannot earn enough to fully support that family .... based on the ins premiums at my job, if I had to add a spouse and 18kids they would take my entire check every month !

Cynamar
05-10-2008, 09:41 AM
I agree, VAKnitter! She has to be worn out. It might not have always been that unusual to have a large family but it's not good for your body. How many women with so many children lived to be in their 80s, I wonder? I knew it was a religion thing when I saw her hair. I'm a Fundamentalist. This is not mainstream.

stitchwitch
05-10-2008, 10:27 AM
I'm guessing that woman's uterus is stretched out to the size of one of those exercise balance balls you do sit ups on.

Cynamar
05-10-2008, 10:47 AM
And imagine other parts if she has nursed all of these babies? There ain't a pushup bra around that could help her.

auburnchick
05-10-2008, 04:14 PM
I've read this thread with interest.

I didn't get to see the bit on the Today Show, but I suspected that they were expecting again when I saw a teaser.

I've read about the family. Did you know that the couple aborted the first child they conceived? They were so riddled with guilt and remorse that they made a vow to God that they would accept the children that He chose to bless them with.

That is the background to the story.

My mom was one of 19 children. There were three sets of twins (she is one of the twins). She grew up in a very traditional Catholic family that had a farm, and they all worked their tails off.


Granted, families of that size are fairly unusual these days, but hey...whatever. They seem to love children and are committed to the promise they made to God. He has obviously provided for them.

I'll pray for safe delivery of child #18 and blessings on that family.

stitchwitch
05-10-2008, 05:01 PM
I've read about the family. Did you know that the couple aborted the first child they conceived?

Nope. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20134584/
According to an article on MSNBC.com
When the Duggars were married in 1984 (she was 17 and he was 19), they didn’t want children immediately, feeling they could not afford them. After four years, Michelle stopped taking birth control pills to have their first child, then went back on birth control after giving birth.
When she got pregnant anyway only to suffer a miscarriage, which they attribute to the birth control pills, the couple felt that they had taken a child’s life. They prayed for forgiveness and for as many children as God decided to give them.

auburnchick
05-10-2008, 06:32 PM
Nope. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20134584/
According to an article on MSNBC.com
When the Duggars were married in 1984 (she was 17 and he was 19), they didnít want children immediately, feeling they could not afford them. After four years, Michelle stopped taking birth control pills to have their first child, then went back on birth control after giving birth.
When she got pregnant anyway only to suffer a miscarriage, which they attribute to the birth control pills, the couple felt that they had taken a childís life. They prayed for forgiveness and for as many children as God decided to give them.


Oh, okay. I got my facts wrong. Thanks for correcting me! Regardless, they have made their decision based on their convictions. I respect them for that (and I'm glad it isn't me raising all of those children!!!).

mwhite
05-10-2008, 07:57 PM
Oh, okay. I got my facts wrong. Thanks for correcting me! Regardless, they have made their decision based on their convictions. I respect them for that (and I'm glad it isn't me raising all of those children!!!).


I agree. My husband and my father both came from large families...both had 10 siblings. Husband's family struggled and dealt with abuse and alcoholism...it was not a healthy situation. He's done well through the years, learning softness, patience, tolerance and love from the "School of Hard Knocks". Daddy's situation was a loving one but grew up during the depression so that made it difficult. The children were not affordable or planned but survived. Neither blame their parents for the blows they've experienced and felt. I was one of four kids. We lived on a dairy farm, never wanting for food, wore alot of hand-me-downs and helped each other with chores which included brushing little sister's hair, finding brother's lost socks, stoking the fire, plucking chickens, skinning squirrels, cooking beans and cleaning the house.

When I married, we had yours, mine and ours children. I had one, which he adopted, he had two from his first marriage and we had a son. Raised all four of them as best we could and all appear to be doing fine. Our daughters have children of their own and are both in their early 30's, the boys are both in their mid-20's, unmarried and no kids. Unfortunately, kids aren't born with a list of instructions and each one is different. I don't envy the Duggars, but the kids seem to be healthy, well adjusted and happy. I just think it's amazing to have this many children. How interesting and unique each one must be and how awesome that they help and support each other. To each his own!

Inis
05-11-2008, 09:33 AM
I agree, VAKnitter! She has to be worn out. It might not have always been that unusual to have a large family but it's not good for your body. How many women with so many children lived to be in their 80s, I wonder? I knew it was a religion thing when I saw her hair. I'm a Fundamentalist. This is not mainstream.

My grandmother died at 86 after having 16 kids.
Hardy stock that I come from - though you'd never know it from all the beotching I do :)
Having such a large family is just from another era. I think that's why we all think it's not normal.

Karina
05-11-2008, 10:05 AM
In theory I don't really care how people live their lives. But living here in the UK where we pay taxes so we can have free schools, free health service and where everybody gets paid child benefit. I have 3 children, for that the government gives me £175 every four weeks. I don't actually needs this money or have asked for it. it is just automatically given to you whether your annual income is £20000 or 3 Million. I personally think this is wrong. you should not be paid for having children, this is a choice I made and should pay for them myself.

Because everybody now lives a lot longer than they used to say 50 years ago, all these services are put under increasing pressure.

Where ever there is a small plot of land here they build a house. next to our house there was a lovely bungalow with a nice garden. it was sold they knocked down the bungalow and there is now 3 4 bed roomed houses on that bit of land.

So yes, live and let live. but deep in my soul I just think they are plain and simple irresponsible no matter how well they look after their kids. These kids will all grow up and all have to have their own car etc etc. What we do don't just affect our own families but everybody in terms of population growth and additional strain on resources.

OK that is my rant over.

KnittingNat
05-12-2008, 09:41 AM
In theory I don't really care how people live their lives. But living here in the UK where we pay taxes so we can have free schools, free health service and where everybody gets paid child benefit. I have 3 children, for that the government gives me £175 every four weeks. I don't actually needs this money or have asked for it. it is just automatically given to you whether your annual income is £20000 or 3 Million. I personally think this is wrong. you should not be paid for having children, this is a choice I made and should pay for them myself.

Because everybody now lives a lot longer than they used to say 50 years ago, all these services are put under increasing pressure.

Where ever there is a small plot of land here they build a house. next to our house there was a lovely bungalow with a nice garden. it was sold they knocked down the bungalow and there is now 3 4 bed roomed houses on that bit of land.

So yes, live and let live. but deep in my soul I just think they are plain and simple irresponsible no matter how well they look after their kids. These kids will all grow up and all have to have their own car etc etc. What we do don't just affect our own families but everybody in terms of population growth and additional strain on resources.

OK that is my rant over.
I wasn't participating in this thread, because i see a lot of families having lots of children and living on child benefit and it makes me angry. But, you shouldn't forget that these days most Europeans have less children than they used to. That affects the population, meaning there are far too many retired old people who need the welfare than young tax-payers. For example, in Russia, you are given 10,000$ for a second child (when he/she reach the age of 2), because they are desperately trying to increase birth rate. That's because in 20 years from now, they will be a country of old people, who can't provide for themselves. It is true that population growth is a problem, but with the increased life span and low birth rate you have a big socio-economical problem. And i think that if the country wants her citizens to have children (i'm not talking 15-17, but 2-3 tops), it's very good that the parents will get child benefit and childcare system, that will allow them to work and pay taxes. Just my humble opinion. Hope i haven't offended or anything :hug:

Karina
05-12-2008, 11:06 AM
Not offended at all everybody should be allowed to have their own opinion on things.

In all Honesty I don't think that a payment of $10,000 would have any effect on my decision to have children. If that is what sways people to start having children I think they have to reassess their values.

I also think there is a difference between a benefit that everybody gets regardless. If Rod Stewart was living in the UK he would get Child Benefit. I can't see how that benefits him in any way whatsoever. (Sorry mind went blank, could not think of somebody more hip than that)

Benefits that help and encourage people to get back to work I'm all for.

Sunshine's Mom
05-12-2008, 02:44 PM
Crazy. Wonder if they've figured out what's causing it?

:roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard: :roflhard:

KnittingNat
05-12-2008, 04:48 PM
Not offended at all everybody should be allowed to have their own opinion on things.

In all Honesty I don't think that a payment of $10,000 would have any effect on my decision to have children. If that is what sways people to start having children I think they have to reassess their values.

I also think there is a difference between a benefit that everybody gets regardless. If Rod Stewart was living in the UK he would get Child Benefit. I can't see how that benefits him in any way whatsoever. (Sorry mind went blank, could not think of somebody more hip than that)

Benefits that help and encourage people to get back to work I'm all for.
We mostly agree that people should think twice before they have children, because they need to provide for them. In this case the country makes the decision easier IMHO. Having children is our personal choice, but it's also has a significant socio-economical meaning. If no one was having kids, who would be living in any country? Who would be working and serving in the army etc. etc.
I'm not saying that rich people should get child benefit, but why not everyone else?
I'm not as cynical as i sound, i'm just living in a country right now that has very high prices on everything, no public childcare till age 3.5-4, but it refuses to call its economy "capitalistic". The government keeps talking about "our future, our children blah blah" and people get something like 20 pounds=40$ of child benefit - that's 3 packs of diapers here. So, i'm just frustrated :hair:.

mum2caden
05-13-2008, 04:20 PM
My grandmother would find that hysterical. But she would probably say that with the house they have, with all their storage space, and with freezers and pantries full of food, it wouldn't be that hard. ;)

Haha, I hear ya! I am from New Brunswick and my Grandmother had 8 kids (but lost several as well :( ) and they never raised each other. They had a tiny house- really, it's smaller than what my parents had for the four of us- my bro, me, parents and our dog. My Grandmother was still washing clothes by hand for a long time... and they had a massive garden and ducks and geese to deal with as well.. besides my Grandpa had a full time job with the railroad.

In today's world it is odd- only because we have it sooo much easier, but you go back a couple generations and it isn't THAT odd.

I say, if they are happy, so what? Who are we to judge?

Simply_Renee
05-14-2008, 11:33 AM
My two cents...

I have watched all of the Duggar family shows so far and have a pretty good handle I think on their beliefs and a lot of questions people have.

1) They are not on any type of assistance. They have invested well (real estate-if I remember right) and used a Christian principled program on financial matters.

2) They believe God gives you the # of children you should have.

3) About the schedule- with a family that size it is a necessity. I don't think the schedule is impersonal and confining, I think it helps them a great deal. Writing down the important things makes them happen- I think we all lose track of things sometimes by just being "too busy" to think of them and do them.

4) They built that house- mostly on their own with some contractor help near the end. Before that they were in a tiny 3 bedroom house (I think they had 15 at the time). It is also paid off, and they are debt free.

While my beliefs are different, I find it hard to criticize anyone who is living the way they feel is right and obviously are commited parents. I wish them the best of luck with all of their children.

GinnyG
05-14-2008, 12:30 PM
Religious issues aside my belief is that having 17+ children is selfish and irresponsible. Yes indeed, families "back in the day" were quite large, but that was before reliable birth control was available.

I have two grown children. My decision to have two was based on how many I felt I could give enough time and attention to AND how many I could afford to educate. Both my children are college graduates.

You would have a hard time convincing me that any family with that many children can provide the amount of quality love and attention a child require.
Yes people who come from large families think they are wonderful but that is all they know.
Will the Duggers be able to ensure that all their children, that want to, are able to have a college education. Or, will the sheer number qulify them for all kinds of "grants" and "scholarships" which ultimately you and I pay for?

stitchwitch
05-14-2008, 01:48 PM
I don't think you have to worry about the females going to college. Their belief is that the woman is submissive to the man of the house. I don't think a college education is part of that. If your job is to have kids and be a housewife, why need an education?

GinnyG
05-14-2008, 02:19 PM
Good point!

Silver
05-14-2008, 02:55 PM
There are some parents having kid after kid JUST for the welfare check it brings, and they let their brats run the streets, who grow up committing crimes. At least the Duggars seem to be good, caring parents to each and every child. If they wanted to raise 100 well mannered kids, I say the more the merrier!

dustinac
05-14-2008, 03:35 PM
I have seen a few of their shows and they are very loving and organized (but you would have to be)...the house they are in they all pitched in and built...if I remeber correctly in that show they had mentioned that the dad and the older sons are like court stenographers or something to that effect...on their website (http://www.duggarfamily.com/aboutus.html)it says they are debt free, both the mom and dad are real estate agents, and the dad was in the House of Rep from 1999-2003...

stitchwitch
05-14-2008, 05:15 PM
I guess my problem isn't with the amount of kids they have but the way they are raising them. Women have come a long way and have fought many uphill battles for equal rights to not be viewed as just a uterus and a servant. Thankfully, these people are only a small sect because they are setting equal rights back hundreds of years. I have no problem with any woman who gives up a career or an education on their own to have a family but to be told from day one that your job will be to reproduce, reproduce, reproduce and to serve your man and take care of his house or God will hate you is just sick in my opinion. We complain about the way women are treated in the Middle East then condone this? I don't get it. They could have 50 kids for all I care if each of them was allowed to have an identity they choose, not a job title that is given to them and brainwashed into their lives.

LilHuskiesFootBallMom
05-15-2008, 09:37 AM
he supposedly used to be a politician.. i've seen some of the shows and to hear some of the things come out of the mouths is heartbreaking... ie finding a life partner and not marrying for love. Yes, they do get paid for the shows and sponsors also go and give them things just to have it appear in the show. The house they were building? TLC ended up finishing building it so that it'd be done for the new season.

I'm the oldest of 11 (i have 8 younger half sisters on my bio dad's side, 2 younger half sibs on my bio mom's...) and was always stuck taking care of the ones from my bio mom.... i figured it out... i'm 29... i have spent 21 years taking care of kids... my younger half sibs from my bio mom since i was 8, then my stepkids and my own kids.

I married for love, I love having a big family (we have 5 kids total) but we have NEVER made the older ones accountable for taking care of the younger ones unless it was a rare night out (as in maybe once or twice a month, if that) and then maybe only for a couple hours (overnights we arrange for dh's parents to take the youngest two). And also ONLY if the older kids didn't have any plans to start with (we always asked first) The older ones are there for fun stuff, not to be babysitters 24/7 and daycare providers.

there is also a BIG age gap between my stepsons and our sons (at least 8 years) and if we have anymore, there'll be another big age gap (again, at least 8 years) and this is just how it's worked out and we found it works financially for us as well.