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View Full Version : Very Hurt By Ravelry-Caution-A Little Whiney


jdee
09-14-2008, 07:23 PM
I just want to tell all of KH how much I appreciate being part of this group. I just spent time on ravelry. There's a political thread in the Remnants forum (not one of the politcal groups), and I've been reading. I've not participated much, but the few times I have, I've come away feeling attacked. Those people are really bloodthirsty. The last time I chimed in, I was put in my place in a way that hurt my feelings so much that I have been in tears much of the day. I still tear up when I think about it. Now, I know I battle depression, and tend to be overly emotional sometimes, but I really was hurt. I don't know why I'm letting it bother me so much, and that fact is making me mad at myself. Sometimes I hate myself.

Here, we all seem to genuinely like eachother. I know we don't know eachother personally, it's just such a welcoming and friendly atmosphere. I mean, even on the two political threads here, where there is plenty of disagreeing, there is still a respectful tone. Not the personal attacks that are allowed on ravelry.

I hate myself for something I did over there. I got so upset, and I've been very emotional lately anyway, that I have been crying most of the day. DH is very protective of me because of my illness and some of the things I've been through lately, so he was ready to defend me. So I let him get on and defend me. I know, I know-It was a bad idea. Anyway, a lot of people have clicked the "funny" button, and the "disagree" button, so now I feel like I'm just a laughing stock over there. I don't know what to do to fix it. I don't what people to dislike me, and think my husband thinks for me. He was just helping me. And I'm the one who asked him to.

Anyway-I have to go now, because I'm starting to cry again. I hope I'm not going to be a laughing stock over here too.:cry:

Doodknitwit
09-14-2008, 07:26 PM
I would suggest not reading that thread!!! Getting that sad
is not worth it

cheley
09-14-2008, 07:28 PM
PM"D you

knitasha
09-14-2008, 07:36 PM
I've participated in that Forum and yes, the emotions are running pretty hot. There are strong opinions on both sides of the issues, particularly about Sarah Palin. I haven't seen many (well, not many) personal attacks, but a number of people who have done extensive homework and know their facts have been impatient with others who have made unsubstantiated statements, or posted opinions based on nothing but their feelings.

Believe me, you are not a laughingstock, there or here. If you feel you made a mistake, well, you made it; it's over. If others misjudged you, it's their problem, not yours. It is also possible that you -- or I, or anybody on that Forum -- may be wrong. Good information can change opinions. Look at the whole thing as an opportunity to learn, not a personal attack.

Whatever you said over there, and whatever anyone said to you, one of the great things about America is that people can still disagree, even though that freedom seems to be eroding. I am sorry that you suffer from depression: I've been there and I know that it hurts; and I am sorry that your feelings have been bruised. It might be better if you stay away from discussions that upset you.

mwhite
09-14-2008, 07:37 PM
I understand your pain, Jdee. However, take Doodknitwit's advice and just walk away from the thread.

No matter what forum you're on, there will always be someone who either forgets or just doesn't have any manners. Some forums don't have any kind of moderation, others do and thank goodness our KH has people with manners and people who moderate.

Ravelry is a huge community and personal feelings tend to get lost in the crowd. Don't right the entire site off because of a few louses...it has plenty of positive forum groups and the information within its boundaries is tremendous and can help you.

Jen17
09-14-2008, 08:29 PM
Ahh, Big Hug Jdee!:hug:
Listen, I have witnessed alot of not so nice things said on sites on the Internet. Some are because some people are ignorant, rude or just plain mean. Some people just don't care about other people's feelings as long as they get to say what it is they want to say.
Sometimes people like to think they are big shots:grrr: and have to put their two cents in where it doesn't belong. That just happened to me, and I was going to reply to it, but it is so not worth it. Also, trying to figure out what a person may mean in an email can be hard.

Now that being said, there are tons more nice people, people who would give you the shirt off their back, money out of their piggy bank, their last cookie:mmm: (o.k., maybe not their last cookie:teehee: ) on this site and they don't even KNOW you!

Forget about it...go take a warm bath or get off the computer and read a book. I promise you, those people that you were dealing with today are not giving it a second thought tonight....and neither should you...life is too short.:muah:

Jen:knitting:

cheley
09-14-2008, 08:44 PM
Ahh, Big Hug Jdee!:hug:
Listen, I have witnessed alot of not so nice things said on sites on the Internet. Some are because some people are ignorant, rude or just plain mean. Some people just don't care about other people's feelings as long as they get to say what it is they want to say.
Sometimes people like to think they are big shots:grrr: and have to put their two cents in where it doesn't belong. That just happened to me, and I was going to reply to it, but it is so not worth it. Also, trying to figure out what a person may mean in an email can be hard.

Now that being said, there are tons more nice people, people who would give you the shirt off their back, money out of their piggy bank, their last cookie:mmm: (o.k., maybe not their last cookie:teehee: ) on this site and they don't even KNOW you!

Forget about it...go take a warm bath or get off the computer and read a book. I promise you, those people that you were dealing with today and not giving it a second thought tonight....and neither should you...life is too short.:muah:

Jen:knitting: Very well spoken..you go girl!!!:cool:

Jan in CA
09-14-2008, 09:06 PM
This is why we work so hard to keep threads from turning hurtful here. It's also why we prefer that people NOT post political threads in the first place.

:hug::hug:

iza
09-14-2008, 09:12 PM
I read the thread you are talking about (I didn't participate in it though), and I hope you know some people defended you. And I'm not talking about your husband. :hug:

Don't take these things personally. There are people on ravelry who just love to challenge other people's ideas, and love to be challenged in return. Unfortunately, some of them forget about the person behind the challenge. I, too, really wish we could all be careful about other people's feelings. :hug:

Seriously, don't let "funny" and "disagree" buttons ruin your life. It's really, really not worth it. Besides, you know how fast people move on on ravelry - the discussion is so far in other directions now! :thumbsup:

jdee
09-14-2008, 09:47 PM
Thanks for all your support. :aww: I'm pretty embarrased about the whole thing now, but at least I'm no longer a wimpering cry baby. I'm sorry for that.

I guess what bothered me, was the fact that they acted like I would choose to be uniformed, and blindly vote for a party, just because I didn't agree with thier ideas. There was one election that I didn't even vote in, because I had so much going on in my life, that I didn't take the time to read, adn research both candidates. I know not voting isn't good, but isn't it better than voting when you don't know what's going on? But I didn't write that, because, I no longer want to be a part of that discussion.
Anyway, it's over now. I appreciate all of you. :hug:

knitgal
09-14-2008, 09:58 PM
I read the thread after you mentioned it and I was expecting a lot worse. I've seen people pretty much attacked on all sides on there.
Tempers run high at Ravelry sometimes. There are people who are very opinionated and they're entitled to it. It's not fair when they attack and there's no reason for it.
I'm sorry this happened to you. I personally try to stay out of the main boards and often only post in groups, which seem to have a little less drama. The political threads (along with relgious threads or anything in Big Issues Debate group) are dangerous to post it.

saracidaltendencies
09-14-2008, 09:58 PM
I'm so sorry you feel this way and for your depression. I know too well how destructive depression is. However, as was mentioned previously, just walk away from it. I really have no respect for anyone who berates others on internet forums (or elsewhere for that matter). I believe people like that have problems and they think it's ok to go off on another on an internet forum because of the level of anonymity. I truly believe anyone who attacks another in such a way is nothing more than a coward with a whole hell of a lot of their own problems. It's one thing to disagree with someone, but a whole other thing to attack someone over their opinions and/or beliefs.

I once belonged to a forum that was for mom's. Eventually it became a war between the stay at home moms and working moms. It was one of the most ridiculous things I had ever seen and it got to the point where everyone was attacking each other over the most stupid things. Eventually I just left. That's not the kind of person I am nor the kind of people I wish to associate with. And, I really don't care what other people think because truly, they don't matter to me; I have all I need: a wonderful husband, 2 beautiful children, and a few close friends. That's all I need.

I understand your frustration but try not to let it bother you. The people there, they don't matter, the things they say about you don't matter because you know who you are, and, the people who love you know who you are. Just walk away from it and let them continue on in their misery. :hug:

auburnchick
09-14-2008, 11:16 PM
I haven't read everyone's responses, so if I'm saying the same thing, forgive me.

One thing I have learned is that we are not perfect. When we get hurt, we tend to lash out as a means of self preservation.

Chalk this up as a learning experience and life lesson.

Then, forgive yourself for your part.

Then, forgive those who said the hurtful things. Yeah, I know. That part is hard. You'll feel a weight lifted from your shoulders though.

And remember that most people are NOT like that.

I hope you feel better soon.

:hug:

Knitting_Guy
09-15-2008, 08:44 AM
Always, ALWAYS avoid threads on religion or politics. They can never turn out well.

jdee
09-15-2008, 08:50 AM
I've seen people pretty much attacked on all sides on there.

Yes, exactly. Isn't it unsettling how quick they are to critisize, without even knowing anything about you? They jump to conclusions, and think they know all about you, and they didn't even read what you wrote? Did you know, they're still making fun of me over there, because of what my husband wrote, even though I've repeatedly apologized.
I know, I know...I'm way too sensitive, but I never got that feeling here, even in the few political threads. Yes, we've had our disagreements, but nobody was bullied, or ridiculed. At least not that I could tell. At least I hope nobody ever felt bullied by anything I wrote, and if they have, please accept my heartfelt apology. I never want to make someone feel like this.

Simply_Renee
09-15-2008, 08:53 AM
Ack! I hate it when people don't realize that other real people are on the other end on the computer. The internet just seems to be a way people can be "anonymously" crappy to each other.

Luckily I seem to only be in forums that are pretty nice on Ravelry. I stay away from any drama there, (and everywhere else in life, come to think of it) because I don't like it.

Hang in there- and you can always leave the group. (after you click on "disagree" on every post that bugs you. Ha!)

cdjack
09-15-2008, 08:56 AM
Months ago, I started reading a thread on Ravelry about MagKnits closing. It was post after post of bitter, angry woman saying hurtful things about the owner of MagKnits and about fellow posters. Someone that most of those people most likely didn't know. Anyway, after that, I haven't read any other posts except for small knitting related groups. I really only use Ravelry to took up patterns.

knitgal
09-15-2008, 09:04 AM
There are also those who have come to your defense, as someone else said.
Don't worry about being sensitive, I am also very sensitive and have suffered from depression.
Ravelry is like many online forums. There are a lot of really really nice people, and a few people who are jerks. I find that a lot of the time people are rude because they think it's funny. I read over the posts that were rude to you and it sounds like people just want to get a rise out of you and cause drama. Or they want to fit in with the "cool kids".
It's much easier to attack someone online because you never actually see them or see the hurt you cause. People think the things they post don't have reprecussions online and they're wrong.
Here's how I often think of people who attack others online: they are sometimes bored (hence the high post count) and often hurt themselves (in real life or online), so they take it out any way they can...usually by attacking someone who has made an innocent post.
I won't say "don't let it bug you" because it obviously does, but perhaps you should stop posting in that thread and put it on "ignore"?

iza
09-15-2008, 09:21 AM
I agree completely with knitgal. The more you post in the thread, the more you draw attention to it. Put that thread on ignore and focus on things that really matters. :hug: A political thread on ravelry and a few members having nothing better to do than to insult people is really not that important.

jdee
09-15-2008, 09:24 AM
perhaps you should stop posting in that thread and put it on "ignore"?

I know you're right. I don't know why I keep coming to it. I guess I'm trying to own up to my mistake, so I can hold onto what little credabilty I have, and maybe I won't become the dork that nobody talks to. I'm afraid threads will come to a screaching halt when I post on them, because nobody wants me there.

This is so silly. I really need to go to bed. I know that sounds wierd at 8:30 in the morning, but insomnia is another of my many problems, and I haven't slept yet.

GinnyG
09-15-2008, 09:30 AM
I am sorry that happened to you. I am on several different online forum and have noticed that each one has a definate "tone" to it, usually set by the more active members.

I don't ever understand why people can't express differing opinions without "attacking", even here I think the political threads became overbearing and decided to bow out. Some are just not happy unless they are able to be "right".

So I guess, for the most part, it's better to stick to the subject of the forum and steer clear of things like politics and religion. There is a a saying that was posted here not too long ago that is so true........ Did you notice that people who what to talk to you about their religious beliefs (and you could substitue any "belief") are not usually willing to listen to you talk about yours!

susi
09-15-2008, 09:39 AM
I havent read the others comments so sorry if im repeating anything anyonce said.

Forget them and the thred, if its upsetting you its just not worth it. I got upset by someone on ravelry earlier this year. i posted a picture of the 1st piece of lace i'd ever done and someone ripped it to pieces. i posted exactly the same and was told it was great but a few minor things (i couldnt see them until id been shown). I was really hurt and upset by it and like you kept going back to see what others had said until soemone had a real dig at the person for replying so hurtfully.

Im sorry you went through it. I dont get people like that, they really really do need to grow up!!

knitpurlgurl
09-15-2008, 09:53 AM
It's human to disagree! Wouldn't it be boring if we were all the same person? However, I agree there is a correct and polite way to voice your opinion without personally attacking another person. We have a right to our own opinions. That's what makes for a truly stimulating world. My hubby is a republican and I a democrat and we have many spirited conversations. But we don't personally attack one another. We respect the other's viewpoint. If you are participating in a thread where respect is not a part of the mantra, then I would advise you to stop participating in the thread. Life is too short to allow others to hurt you over your opinion. We may all have different viewpoints, but we're all human. And we all have feelings, families, and struggles. Understanding that about each other makes for a better world.

ladyjessica
09-15-2008, 10:04 AM
Ack! I hate it when people don't realize that other real people are on the other end on the computer. The internet just seems to be a way people can be "anonymously" crappy to each other.



My sentiments exactly. I haven't read the forum of which you're speaking so I may be totally off base here, but it's long been my opinion that it's much easier for people to ridicule and attack others online than it is in person. All they have to do is type and hit a button and it's done. They don't have to see the hurt in someone's eyes and the confusion and the visible upset that they may possibly, or probably, have caused.

I've read many threads on other boards that have gotten very heated and where people have completely attacked and put down everyone who didn't agree with them. Sometimes I would really like to see these people say the things to someone's face that they say online and see if they still have the same effect. I would venture to say that there would be very few of them who could actually defend the things they say and the way the say them if they were speaking to an actual person and not a computer monitor.

Anyway, I'm sorry your feelings were hurt, but I agree with what other people have said here - just walk away and try not to let it get you down. Some of these people probably put people down because it makes them feel better about themselves. I say if they're that small-minded, let them be. You're better than that, and there's no need to stoop to their level.

Just my opinion.

:hug:

Knitting_Guy
09-15-2008, 10:28 AM
I agree there is a correct and polite way to voice your opinion without personally attacking another person.

Sadly, there are many people in the world who lack either the intelligence or the maturity to understand this concept. They invariably resort to personal attacks as they view any disagreement with their ideas to be a personal attack in itself.

Very childish IMHO

Crycket
09-15-2008, 10:47 AM
A former Co-worker of mine is on the forums for General Hospital all the time...the thing is just a hairpullingfest... Everyone wants to throw their digs in about the other characters and why they are right. She has read a few to me...they are quite vile sometimes...

And that is just over fictional characters! *smiles*

With politics it is the same....you find your ground and you hold it firm. And if it seems you or something you believe in is under attack, you bite back hard....

I personally don't like conflict, and there for, as hard as it can be sometimes, just shrug my shoulders and agree to disagree. It is not that I don't believe in my view...it is just becoming a waste of time arguing...*smiles*

*hugs* Don't mind them...stay off that board til you get yourself feeling better about it...then jump in with renewed gusto...

KnittingNat
09-15-2008, 11:24 AM
I'm sorry you had to go through this :hug:and like others said - political and religious discussions are dangerous. Don't forget that Ravelry has more than 180,000 members now and there are different kinds of people out there. You don't have to feel defensive over a political discussion with people you've never seen. There are some groups that seems very hurtful to some (there are the Sara Palin haters and the Childfree groups, just for example), but when you read through one of these, you have to know what you're getting into - not everyone on the forums are nice and lovely and the tone of the groups is set by the creator and the members. On the other side, there are wonderful, supporting and caring groups on Ravelry (speaking from my personal experience) that are not knitting related. Don't be put off by nasty people, because Ravelry does offer some great stuff.
On a more personal note - thank you all KH members for being so great with each other:hug:

Mike
09-15-2008, 01:18 PM
Ravelry can be a pain at times and their policy of not banning people doesn't help.
I'm not sensitive or depressed but I do have panic disorder which makes me dread things like that.

Remember the name and check their posts out in a few months.
I bet you'll find them doing the exact same thing to others. You'll clearly see that it's them with the problem.
Don't worry about credibility, the people you are dealing with aren't credible.

You can hide all those "other" Ravelry forums that can't be removed on their own tab so you don't have to see them and just keep the groups you are in on the main forum tab.
I don't remember how to do it but it's pretty easy to figure out, when I read that I went right to the forums page and got it figured out.

knitasha
09-15-2008, 01:48 PM
JDee--
I stayed up late last night and re-read the entire thread -- all 59 pages of it -- to find out why it disturbed you so.

Here is your original post, near the beginning.


Well, I like her. And I share many of her beliefs. Sorry. (referring to Sarah Palin.)


It sounded a little defensive to me, but no problem.

Two people quickly responded; one was pro McCain, one was pro Obama. Both were supportive.



Don’t apologize. I like her too. I could go on, but I don’t think this is the right place to get into a political discussion.


Never apologize for your political beliefs.

So far so good.

On page 34 someone wrote (not directed to you):
My point was that the Republicans tend to go to conservative sources, and then spout what they hear as if it were the Gospel truth. AFAIK, most of the Democrats I know bother to fact-check before they believe.

On page 36 you responded to this comment:
I’m a little offended by this rather blanket statement. I’m a republican, and I DO fact check. DH and I flip channels so we can watch ALL the news from ALL perspectives, and If I get one of those crazy emails, I dismiss everyting it says until I can research it. I don’t like being lumped into a catagory.

Someone responded (a little snarkily):
Honey, you really should pick up a newspaper now and then. Listening to all the different pundits is not fact checking. Sorry, but the cable news networks now are infotainment, not information.


To which you replied:
Honey, I don’t only listen to the news. I also can read. I was just pointing out that one shouldn’t lump all of any group into a catagory. I guess no matter what I say, I’m going to be told that I’m uninformed, unintellegent, and just plain wrong.


A page later your husband's defense of you appeared, and several jokey responses to it. It would serve no purpose to reprint them here.


I'm not interested in defending the people on Ravelry but I am concerned that throughout these brief exchanges you said more derogatory things about yourself than others did. You put yourself down and responded to or anticipated attacks that weren't there.


I hope you are being properly treated for your depression and trying to find out why you are so hard on yourelf.

http://assets.ravelry.com/images/silk-comment.png (http://www.ravelry.com/discuss/remnants/333877/876-900#)

Puddinpop
09-15-2008, 02:07 PM
Don't let people have control over you. If they say something that you don't like, don't take it to heart. That just lets people have control over you. It's just like on Top Model, there is this girl named Hannah, who has not been around people who don't have the same morals and people try to attack her because she does. They see that they got to her and made her cry by attacking her when a guy who is a girl now, started leaning back on her in the hot tub. She didn't let her lay on her and pushed her away. A few of them started verbally attacking her. It was so weird how they twisted things around, but people do that. They have the problem.

jdee
09-15-2008, 02:43 PM
After this exchange, she came back on and wrote
I'm sure your not inintellegent.


This was clearly meant tell me that I'm uninformed, and just plain wrong. Just plain wrong doesn't bother me, but uninformed always has rubbed me so wrong, because I've always studied up, read about, and voted my convictions on all the issues and candidates. My dad is the kind of person who wouldn't question anything, but just vote for his party. I'm not like that. Besided she intended to ridicule me and my beliefs, and lump me into a catagory. I hate that. I hate it when people do it to liberals, and I hate it when people do it to conservatives. And the idea that I only watch some entertainment show for my news, then go around spouting it is untrue also. I never "spout" anything. I read up on my candidates, choose the one I feel best represents what I believe is best for our country, and I go vote for that person. End of story.

I guess it just surprised me, because I thought that the thread was meant to intellegently present boths sides, and have a discussion. I didn't realize you had to agree with the popular opinion or be humiliated. And, yes, I believe the poster's purpose, in this case, was to humiliate me.

And I'm not ever upset with polite and respectful disagreement. That's totally fine. Even the first person, who called me "disgusting" didn't bother me, because I viewed that as childish, and let it roll off of me. I don't know how to explain why the other bothered me so much.

Yes, I'm taking 20mg lexipro. Sometimes I still have bad days, but it keeps me fairly on track. I tried talk to a councilor, but ended up feeling worse that I did before-but that's another story.

GinnyG
09-15-2008, 03:04 PM
This is JMO, and doesn't need to be shared by others, but I don't think we should be cutting and pasting sections of discussions from another forum HERE. What is posted on a forum should stay on that forum. And I think it's a bit dangerous when you just cut and paste portions of a discussion. But that is JMO.

Jeremy
09-15-2008, 03:42 PM
Its stunning how often people feel completely free to vent on line without thought that there is a human being on the other end. Try not to think too much about this.:hug:

Jan in CA
09-15-2008, 03:51 PM
This is JMO, and doesn't need to be shared by others, but I don't think we should be cutting and pasting sections of discussions from another forum HERE. What is posted on a forum should stay on that forum. And I think it's a bit dangerous when you just cut and paste portions of a discussion. But that is JMO.

I agree. Please don't cut and paste other forum discussions here.

stitchwitch
09-15-2008, 04:30 PM
Always, ALWAYS avoid threads on religion or politics. They can never turn out well.
Best advice yet! My mom always told me when I was growing up...don't discuss politics or religion with anyone unless you want a fight. She was right! I can't understand why people want to go 'round and 'round over something that other people have already made their minds up to. It's not going to change their mind and someone or everyone always ends up with hurt feelings. Political and religious threads or discussions serve no purpose other than to try and cram a viewpoint down someone's throat while they are thinking of a way to cram their's down yours.

jdee
09-15-2008, 04:36 PM
This is JMO, and doesn't need to be shared by others, but I don't think we should be cutting and pasting sections of discussions from another forum HERE. What is posted on a forum should stay on that forum. And I think it's a bit dangerous when you just cut and paste portions of a discussion. But that is JMO.

I agree with you. I'm sorry.

Mike
09-15-2008, 04:41 PM
I tried talk to a councilor, but ended up feeling worse that I did before-but that's another story.

LOL, the last time I went to a doctor to get more Xanax they stuck me with some retired therapist (I got to a hospital clinic type thing).
I was doing so good until that day.

I don't know if he was trying to make me mad to see if I was bi-polar or what but he set me back from having to take the Xanax at most once a week to having to take it daily.

Mulderknitter
09-15-2008, 04:55 PM
:muah: Aww! I just want to give you so many big hugs JDee! You are a very nice person and were just trying to join in a discussion, not get put down, or felt put down. really, listen to all of our sage KH'ers, just let it go.
People are going to be like that everywhere all of our lives, it's just a fact. It's not you, it's them. I just like to imagine that they are just as miserable as they try to make others feel, but they feel that way all the time. They are just taking it out on others.

knitasha
09-15-2008, 05:28 PM
I apologize for posting from another forum, although it seemed relevant to this discussion.

I'm not sure how it's different from linking to other information, but if that's the regulation I'll adhere to it.

JDee, Lexapro is helpful (I've been there) but I hope you'll try counseling again with somebody else. It could help you understand why things make you feel as bad as they do. Sometimes depression is a simple brain chemistry problem, and meds are sufficient to control it. Sometimes it's more complicated, and therapy is the key to improvement.

NikitaShera
09-15-2008, 05:40 PM
Hugs to Jdee. Pm'd you.

Knitting_Guy
09-15-2008, 06:15 PM
Arguing with someone about politics is like wrestling a pig in the mud. After a while you realize that the pig enjoys it.

jdee
09-15-2008, 06:24 PM
Arguing with someone about politics is like wrestling a pig in the mud. After a while you realize that the pig enjoys it.
:roflhard: Thanks for the laugh.

jdee
09-15-2008, 06:33 PM
I apologize for posting from another forum, although it seemed relevant to this discussion.

I'm not sure how it's different from linking to other information, but if that's the regulation I'll adhere to it.

JDee, Lexapro is helpful (I've been there) but I hope you'll try counseling again with somebody else. It could help you understand why things make you feel as bad as they do. Sometimes depression is a simple brain chemistry problem, and meds are sufficient to control it. Sometimes it's more complicated, and therapy is the key to improvement.
I know I should, but both times I've tried have not been successful at all. The first time, our insurance changed. I'm not sure why, but they no longer would pay, and after they did that, she decided that I was much better. The second time...Well, it's a very long story, that could lead to more whining and tears on my part, and probably cause severe boredom for all you good people who are nice enough to read my post.

Lucy78green
09-15-2008, 07:08 PM
Some people seem to like arguing for the sake of it. Possibly it amuses them, maybe they have small lives??
I used to run a Yahoo Group, and one of the trolls decided to impersonate me, argue with me, and spread rumours that I was an international drugs dealer. Deleting his membership didn't help, he would just rejoin with a new one. Think he got bored in the end... can't remember but I was very upset at the time (think I was 19/20). Since then if something upsets me online I avoid it! My Yahoo account got hacked into a few years ago and I lost it, but I decided I'm having nothing more to do with Yahoo.
Politics and religion and moralistic things in general are things that people have set opinions on and are unlikely to change. The more extreme people's views are the more they are used to defending them, so they tend to be able to reel off a load of "facts" (which are really opinion or biased). I may know that I fundamentally disagree with someone, but I don't learn all my reasons off by heart! Some people think that by shouting louder or getting the last word in, they have won the argument, but if their argument hasn't succeeded in making me change my opinion, they haven't won!
I'm not a confrontational person, I avoid arguments at all cost, though sometimes this is not a good thing, I think I need to learn to stand up for myself more.

cheley
09-16-2008, 06:25 AM
Can someone tell me what "JMO" is :doh: Thank you

cheley
09-16-2008, 06:28 AM
Can someone tell me what "JMO" is :doh: Thank you Never mind just got it!!!

Crycket
09-16-2008, 11:02 AM
Some people seem to like arguing for the sake of it. Possibly it amuses them, maybe they have small lives??


That is so true!

We just had a talk with my Pathfinders (Girl Guides between 12-14) about bullying, and they were telling me (cause I am so out of it) that cyber bullying as become the new bullying.

I don't think that this is the case here, it just surprized me how mean kids could be.

I also agree that religion and politics are two places better left alone. I don't hold many strong feelings on either but there was one Provincial official that I think was doing a really great job (a long while back) and I don't think I have found too many that share my view...which would explain why he isn't in office any longer...

As previously mentioned before...I just agree to disagree...for most things....not that I don't have a strong opinion or that I don't have the back bone to stand up for it...just that when two ppl stand together and have no intention of seeing the other side, there is just no point.

ie. I once had a co-worker argue me that the word "selfless" shouldn't exist...she seemed to think that even with the best intentions, there are no selfless acts, because somewhere deep down....you wanted to do - what ever it is - ..... To this day she won't bend...to this day....I still don't agree.....

PS...what is AFAIK?...wait...is it As Far As I know?

jdee
09-18-2008, 03:54 PM
Arguing with someone about politics is like wrestling a pig in the mud. After a while you realize that the pig enjoys it.

Mason, when I told my husband about what you said here, he added that also, your getting just as dirty, and soon it's hard to tell the difference between you (I mean "you" as in general person, not you personally) and the pig.

LilHuskiesFootBallMom
09-18-2008, 05:16 PM
politics is always nasty business.... same with religion. This is why i KNIT in my political science class. My teacher's supposed to be teaching us about both sides but always teaches HIS side and i disagree with a LOT of what he says. However, I can't drop the class because I need it for graduation next may and he is the ONLY one who teaches it.

That being said...

I disagree with a lot of people's political views, On here we could get into a huge debate and end up in a flame war over candidates, parties, and our various religions... but the NICE thing about it is we always seem to put the one thing we have in common the most first and let the nastiness of volitile topics go right down there with caring about how much grass has grown over the past couple days.

:grphug: Don't let em get to ya.... just remember to keep :knitting: and know that we only have a couple of months before this political stuff is over with and the votes are tallied and the topics can go back to why they do or don't like who ended up being president.