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View Full Version : OT: How often to you talk to your mother?


newamy
12-22-2009, 09:16 PM
If your mother is living (apologies to those who no longer have a mother) and you have a relationship that involves communication, how frequently do you talk to her by phone?

Daily?
Weekly?
Other?
Who calls you or her?

If you live near enough how often do you see her?

Daily?
Weekly?
Other?

gotta knit
12-22-2009, 09:56 PM
We talk practically every day. Mom usually calls first, but if I haven't heard from her and realize it, I'll call her.

I try to see her at least weekly. She loves to see her grandkids as much as possible.

Jan in CA
12-22-2009, 10:09 PM
My mom died when I was 20 (cancer).

Okay, I know you didn't ask so disregard if you have no interest, but.... I talk to at least one of my daughters almost every day by email. We talk on the phone a couple times a week.

saracidaltendencies
12-22-2009, 11:24 PM
I talk to my mom every day, even if there's nothing new...lol...I used to see my mom and dad more, when hubby was going to school in the evenings, but, there's been so much going on lately I haven't been going over there as much as I used to...They live only a couple streets away from me though, within walking distance...lol...My family still sees each other a ton though, we're always getting together for birthdays or holidays, or just 'cause.

LizzieK8
12-23-2009, 07:25 AM
Once every ten years or so. Our relationship is less than cordial and more than strained.

mwhite
12-23-2009, 09:44 AM
If your mother is living (apologies to those who no longer have a mother) and you have a relationship that involves communication, how frequently do you talk to her by phone?

Daily?
Weekly?
Other?
Who calls you or her?

If you live near enough how often do you see her?

Daily?
Weekly?
Other?

Mom lives about 15 minutes away....talk to her weekly, we call back and forth. I realize how fortunate I am to still have her and I want her to know how much I love her. She's 77, still working as a caregiver (a job she's great at), active and a superb cook and very accomplished crocheter. She's always been my biggest fan and supporter.....a gorgeous, auburn-haired woman, tall and very ladylike. She's the very best!!! :muah: :hug:

kellyh57
12-23-2009, 11:27 AM
We talk on the phone once a week at least. Now, during the holidays, we've been talking a LOT more. We usually have our Sunday evening chat though.

My mom is about 3 1/2 hours away, so we only see each other about once a month. Sometimes it's longer between visits and sometimes shorter, but it averages out to about once a month.

She doesn't email much and it's usually just pictures or forwards if they do email. She convinced me to get Skype so she could see the kids more often, but she hasn't installed it on her computer yet! Silly Mom!

vaknitter
12-23-2009, 12:36 PM
Used to be once a week, since she was diagnosed with breast cancer we talk almost every day. She lives about 10hrs away so face to face vists are only a couple times per year.

melmac51
12-23-2009, 12:44 PM
My mom lives about 45 minutes away. I see her at least once every two weeks, sometimes more. We talk on the phone every couple of days. We're very close and have a great relationship.

miccisue
12-23-2009, 05:14 PM
I work with my mom, so it's everyday but Sunday for me.:teehee:

meowmeowmeow
12-23-2009, 10:03 PM
I do talk to some other family members, but with them its more of a friendship than a feeling that I have to talk to them because of biology.We text, hang out all the time(any free time), and watch movies with all my other friends; and we don't ever censor ourselves for each others' comfort. We are us regardless.We could debate and disagree and see some truth in the other side and even change our own opinions because of some new information.

I could never bring my friends to see my mom because she would ask what their races,religions and sexual orientations were before she'd approve of our friendship.Let's just say I changed my number 5 months ago and none of us cares that she didn't get the new one.

Ronda
12-24-2009, 10:15 AM
My mother and I are more like friends. She lived 4 hours away from me for 18 years. Now she lives about 1 mile away.

When she lived 4 hours away, we communicated by e-mail every day. I have Vonage, so I called her whenever I wanted to talk, but I'm not much of a talk-on-the-phone person. We saw each other probably every few months.

Now that she lives just down the road from me, we still communicate a lot by e-mail. We'll shoot each other a quick message frequently through the day. We see each other probably twice a week, once being on Sunday at church and then we have lunch together.

cdjack
12-24-2009, 12:04 PM
My Mom lives about 50 minutes from me. That's 50 minutes if there's not one bit of Dallas traffic that I have to sit in. We usually see each other either once a week or once every two weeks. We meet for lunch half way. We talk or email a few times a week.

Woodi
12-24-2009, 06:33 PM
My mother and I were never friends. I left home at 19, hoping to get as far away from my folks as possible. Still, they followed me around....forced themselves into my life after I had children. I tolerated their visits once or twice a year.

After my mom's first heart attack when she was 66, she phoned once a week, and I would try to comfort her. Then she had another, and heart surgery, and decided she wanted to move in with us. My husband said no, and fortunately my Dad didn't want to. We tried to find them accomodations closer to us than the 4 hour drive, but Dad didn't want to leave his home of 30 years, so they stayed there until Mom had a stroke, at age 78. My brother, husband and I had to clean out their house and sell it, and find them a nursing home to live in within an hour's drive from both of us.

Mom now cannot speak at all, and I enjoy her company much better this way. I see them once a week when they insist on coming here for lunch and supper.

Not everyone has a good relationship with their parents. You who do are fortunate, I guess.

LizzieK8
12-25-2009, 08:21 AM
Mom now cannot speak at all, and I enjoy her company much better this way.
:roflhard:
I know exactly what you mean! My mother has a very sharp critical tongue that even at age 57 cuts me to the bone every time. She would be so much easier to be around if she didn't speak.

meowmeowmeow
12-26-2009, 10:31 PM
:roflhard:
I know exactly what you mean! My mother has a very sharp critical tongue that even at age 57 cuts me to the bone every time. She would be so much easier to be around if she didn't speak.

My mother is ridiculously critical, rude and condescending. Because of this, she actually has no friends; not one/zip/nil/nada.See!It's not just me that can't stand her.There is a club. I'm sure not speaking would get her social life rolling on the right track.She could even be "a great listener" one day XD

offgridgirl
12-27-2009, 10:31 PM
I talk to my Mum once,maybe twice/month. She calls me back after I leave a message. She lives on the other side of the country so I haven't seen her since I visited two years ago. She has only visited me here once in 20 years.

UruzPhoenix
12-29-2009, 03:45 AM
I talk to my Nana (grandma, she's the one that raised me, we do not speak of egg donor after she said the unforgiveable to me.. egg donor is dead to me and bio-sperm donor has never been in the picture) at least once a week. She lives about 7 hours away (as i drive) so I don't get to see her very often at all (as in i make the drive once every 2-3 years.. it's hard with dh's work schedule and the kids school/sports schedules... we're planning on a surprise visit to her next month)

Doublereeder2
12-29-2009, 09:14 AM
I talk to my 89 yr old mother daily, sometimes twice a day. She lives 1500 miles away, so I only see her every few months - when I fly there. She is here right now for 3 weeks - yes, that is a very good thing. She is a wonderfully sweet and funny lady and I love her dearly.

margz3
12-29-2009, 12:58 PM
As we are now living in the same house hold, I see and talk to my Mom everyday. However, prior to that we would talk on the phone about weekly and see each other a couple of times a month (we were about an hour and a half away). We are lucky to have always had a great relationship

GinnyG
12-29-2009, 01:18 PM
My Mom has been gone for many years, we didn't have the best relationship but I did try to call her once a week. She was never on email, I might have preferred emailing to talking.......

My children are grown and live far away. I think we have good relationship and I usually speak to them weekly and email inbetween if there is something to report.

AngelaR
12-29-2009, 09:17 PM
No more than is absolutely necessary, such is our relationship. I don't hate her or anything, but we've never been close. I talk to my mother-in-law several times a week and she lives across the street. I adore her.

bambi
12-30-2009, 09:37 PM
I talk to my mom 2 or 3 times a week. I used to talk to her every day when I was single and childless. I feel very lucky to have her around to talk to.

Debkcs
12-31-2009, 04:09 AM
I've always envied those of you who have good relationships with your moms. I wish! Since she made everyone around her lives miserable, she has no friends and no family that can stand her.

My darling mother in law was quite opposite, and of course she passed away, while mine lives on.

lelvsdgs
01-01-2010, 10:48 AM
I just wanted to say thank you to all of you who answered this thread. I lost my mom 9 years ago and we used to talk weekly. She lived at the opposite end of CA so we didn't see each other often. She hated the computer and wouldn't use it so we relied on the phone.

I count myself lucky to have had such a wonderful relationship with my mom, we were friends and shared so much. I miss her so much but we do still "talk". She visits in my dreams when I really need her.

To those of you who don't have good relationships with your mothers, I hope that you have found someone that has taken that place in your lives. Mother-in-laws, grandmas, those women can be just as powerful in your lives...

Thanks again for sharing your experiences. Just goes to show you that the human spirit keeps going, even in less than perfect circumstances!:notworthy:

2girlsmom
01-01-2010, 03:40 PM
I talk to her every day, sometimes more than once a day. :aww: She is one of my best friends. If for some reason we don't connect because we are busy one of us always calls and asks "you ok?" :rofl:

I feel some what co-dependant :rofl: but, she truly is one of my best friends. I don't know what I'll do someday when I have to say goodbye. :( She is 58 so hopefully we have a good long time before that happens. I have 2 daughters, 6 and almost 3, and I hope to someday be a mom like my mom is to me... and be their friends.

Jan in CA
01-01-2010, 04:07 PM
I talk to her every day, sometimes more than once a day. :aww: She is one of my best friends.

My oldest daughter told me that last Christmas and we both ended up crying. I'm close to both my daughters and pretty close to my stepdaughter, too. :hug:

Quiltlady
01-02-2010, 02:24 PM
[quote=newamy;1267277]If your mother is living (apologies to those who no longer have a mother) and you have a relationship that involves communication, how frequently do you talk to her by phone

I talk to my dear Mother almost daily. She will be 83 this week and is in good health. My dad died five years ago on New Years Day. She lives about 20 minutes away and I see her about once a week. I am blessed to still have her.

Sunshine's Mom
01-04-2010, 04:42 PM
I speak to my mom weekly, I'd say. It's nothing set in stone. Just whenever we each feel like talking. It's been more lately because of the holidays and because my dad recently had a quadruple by-pass (mid-November, scary stuff. All is okay now.). We spent a lot of time together then. My folks only live about 10 minutes away. Just far enough. Love them both very much. Love my in-laws too and speak to them weekly, although my hubby speaks to them daily.

dustinac
01-04-2010, 04:51 PM
My mom is one of my best friends too...now during the teen years we had our moments but now are very close. We usually talk daily (most of the time it's 2/3 times) we text one another...and e-mail.

We are about 4hrs away and before the kids were in school we would drive down every month...but now we don't get home like we did. She will come up here though...like we just got home for the holidays and she will be up in Feb. :thumbsup:

Mike
01-04-2010, 06:24 PM
1988

Before then at least once a week. But comparing notes with my siblings proved interesting. I guess once she couldn't play us against each other (because we learned to check before going off based on anything she said) it was no fun having kids any more.
I'm much better off without her.

evona
01-07-2010, 05:05 PM
I talk to my mom at least once a week. She lives in the bay area and I live in L.A. so we don't get to see each other often though. We aren't "best friends" but I love her and as she ages I worry more and more about her being so far away.

I am very close to my MIL as well. She just recently got a Macbook and is now even on FB, although she very rarely logs on. We see each other for lunch or dinner usually about once a week.

My daughter came for Thanksgiving, broke up with her boyfriend soon thereafter and has been back at home ever since - for the mean time at least. We still have our ups and downs as she is 19 and still believes she knows everything and has the world by a string (oh to be young again), but we are pretty close and even while she was briefly out of the house we at least texted each other daily. She is my FB friend and I often post on her statuses or pictures as she does on mine and we always send pictures of silly, funny or interesting things we see during the day to each other. I hope that we remain friends like that forever.