View Full Version : Anxiety... any tips?
01-20-2008, 06:30 PM
Um, I apparently had an anxiety attack Friday night; at least that what the EMS guys told me. Basically it's because my boss has been intimidating me and Friday something happened that even though my union steward said was not my fault I had a sinking feeling earlier in the day that I was going to be drug into the office again for more harassment and finger pointing. Was it my subconscious that flipped a switch just two stops before returning to the building or what? I felt lightheaded and my fingers were really tingly.
I don't know what they are going to do on Monday. Maybe send me to the clinic for an evaluation? I know I need to talk to someone regarding what has been going on. But in the meantime any advise on how to tune out my boss or suppress the anxiety feeling would be helpful.
Internal Guided Imagery is a good way
Imagine yourself in a calm soothing place
like a tropical Island with a cool breeze gently touching your cheek, and the gentile lap of the waves along the shore, and then once you have a place of calm, bring this "Boss/Supervisor" into your Quiet place, in Full Clown Makeup and only Boxer Shorts (Lilac purple with Pink Flowers and smiley faces for the middle of the flowers)
This should help, ASSUMMING you have already gone the route of reporting the SOB to HR and doing what you can to protect yourself in the workplace.
I have always had SOMEONE where-ever I worked who was willing to go to bat for me (usually one of my direct supervisors) but I know how miserable it can be to deal with a Bully (part of WHY I always find at least one person at every job who is willing to back me up in a Scrap)
If you need me to come get all "Scary pissed off Dyke" on him I will
01-20-2008, 07:06 PM
No advice...just a hug.
01-20-2008, 07:09 PM
Do you have an HR department? Someone you can report the way your boss has been treating you?
01-20-2008, 07:11 PM
I'm the same as Auburnchick, no advice just a big :hug:
Good luck Monday!
01-20-2008, 07:18 PM
I'd get an official diagnosis of anxiety caused by stress, then take it to your boss's superior maybe. Point out that if the boss causes you to develop chronic panic attacks and anxiety, they'll be out a worker and have to pay for sick leave.
But I'd second the 'safe place and flourescent shorts' idea. Just remember not to laugh.
Pat in Ca
01-20-2008, 07:38 PM
I have a close relative with anxiety problems....He has had many Dr's
suggest "Biofeedback".. it is a breathing technique... long slow breaths// count 6 on in breath 7 on out.. need to get co 2 out of system as it produces anxiety..try it for 10 times... it works.. Biofeedback.. only way without drugs.
01-21-2008, 02:52 AM
I used to deal with depression and anxiety. It was not a fun thing to go through. My therapist really helped me to get past my fears and live my life courageously.
One of my exercises was to make a list of all the things I would like to do before I die. So, I made the list, and then started finding ways to DO those things.
It was wonderful! (Knitting was one of the things on my list.) I was so busy DOING things that I WANTED to do, that I didn't have time to worry about the things that bothered me.
When I was in a better frame of mind, I was able to face my anxieties and other issues with confidence. My life got much better, and my anxiety went away. :)
I hope you can find peace in your life, my friend. :hug:
01-21-2008, 04:28 AM
Thanks for your advise, understanding, tips and of course the "hugs".
I understand what you are saying about reporting him and I know that there is a program in place for that. But won't that just bring more hostile feelings toward me? I feel very helpless in this situation.
A part of this whole mess is that I had a work related injury last June and I'm still not over it even though an "independent evaluator" says I'm fine to work. I'm now left to deal with the injury on my own. In the meantime I'm getting "That is unacceptable" type remarks from my boss because I take longer to do my job now along with unnecessary jabs with no intention other than to irritate me. I don't think I have the strength to fight all these battles. It sucks too because I was so healthy just last year I ran my first marathon and now I can hardly run or bike; I often feel week and helpless. I've found some relief through swimming, but that is rather boring and not enough cardio. I just want to be whole again.
I of course Googled breathing techniques and stress mantras which I hope will at least temporarily help. I'll try to picture him wearing the lilac boxers with flowers and faces. Maybe I'll just do the meditating "AUM" hum the whole time.
Thanks for sharing your own story Sandy. I know I'm not the only one that's ever had to deal with this.
I had a bad situation with a supervisor at my last job which lead to anxiety. It was reported to HR but the only way I got over it in the end was to leave. :oops:
:hug::hug::hug::hug:to you :hug::hug::hug::hug:
01-21-2008, 02:51 PM
If possible, find a new job. (easier said than done)
I had a job with a boss who was... less than good. I didn't really realize how badly working for him had effected me until I quit. Afterwards, I was upset with myself for how long I had put up with it all. I had always told myself that it was just a job and that it couldn't bother me outside of work (total denial here). When one part of your life sucks, it leaks into the other parts of your life like an infection that can't be stopped.
Life is short, and there is no point in wasting time with a job that is causing you this much harm. Start looking for a new job.
Pat in Ca
01-21-2008, 03:04 PM
Just by breathing slow and long even breathes will take you to a relaxed place... sometimes meditation cannot be done in the middle of work, but the breathing technique can be done anywhere.It is the breathing that is achieved by meditation that puts you in a relaxed state....Here is a website .. www.bfe.org ...download ez-air... this will put a therometer icon on your computer for free that will teach you the timing of breathing that is best for you.. experiment.. with different number of breaths per minute for what is "comfortable" (start faster and work up to slower) for you good luck..
01-21-2008, 08:34 PM
I also think a new job is the answer. Just look in the ads, or browse the online job search companies. There's no reason to work for a person who treats you that way.
01-22-2008, 09:28 AM
I have had anxiety/panic attacks for a long time. It is a hard thing to deal with. First, I agree on getting a new job, and Sandy's advice is good as is the relaxation advice. Try to find things (the more simple the better) to get your mind off of the stress. This sounds kinda goofy but I do cross word puzzles, word searches, knit (of course), and things like that just to give my mind a break.
I'll be thinking about you, we are all here if you want to talk.
:hug: :muah: :hug:
01-22-2008, 06:08 PM
:muah: Thanks again for all the tips. I do understand what you all are saying about finding a new job, but 1) I've been with the company since 1990 and have way too much time invested in retirement 2) management gets moved around all the time and I just recently heard that this particular jerk is being moved to a different center in less than 2 weeks 3) I have excellent benefits along with good pay 4) are you kidding? I live in Michigan.... we don't have any jobs here! :p
I'll definitely check out the breathing techniques as suggested. I also talked to a councilor this morning and that might help.
An excerpt from my work blog:
Monday, January 21, 2008
I've Had It! (http://myupsblog.blogspot.com/2008/01/ive-had-it.html)
I suppose it's not very surprising that Monday I was in the office with Randy, Mike Z and Tom the union steward. Randy says to Tom in that matter-of-fact voice of his. "Marlene felt the need to have us call EMS on Friday night." Then of course stated his concern for my mental well-being. He stated that the EMS report states that this anxiety or panic attack isn't really a "medical emergency." He wanted to verify when it was that I told Lynette that I wasn't feeling well too... so was it after you punched out or before? he asked. What a jerk! Never once did he even ask if I was ok. Mike didn't either, but I'm sure that Randy schooled him not to ask.
Oh boy, he's done it now. I couldn't help myself I pretty much let loose and told him that he was treating me in an intimidating, demeaning, belittling and bullying manner. I told him that I would think that a manager at his level would know the risks involved with rattling someone's cage before sending them out on the road to drive a 2-ton truck. "At least that's my perception", I told him. Apparently you can say anything you want to these guys so long as it's you state it as your perception or feeling.
I was pretty much in a "zone" and wasn't really registering what he said, which was probably for the better. I looked at Tom at one point and he mouthed out "you're doing fine" so I guess I hadn't said anything that would get me fired. I continued on and rather than letting him continue to stay in control of the situation and think he had gotten the best of me; since he doesn't think it was a medical emergency which was bull crap, I offered up that this incident might have been more than it appears and could very well been caused by a lack of calorie intake since I've been eating the same stuff I was eating when I wasn't doing my regular job and that the green tea I had just prior to the incident occurring could have had something to do with it. I had to further explain that green tea has caffeine in it. While I don't want him to think it was something that I did to cause it; I also don't want him to think he has gotten the best of me.
After that it was a pretty uneventful day other than having a “missed” package because it was loaded near the end of my day and of course closed when I got there.
01-22-2008, 07:40 PM
I think you've gotten some great advice so far. I also think you're right to hold on to this job. I don't know Michigan law but in CT the independent medical exam (read the employers dr.) is not automatically believed. Sometimes its necessary for the Commissioner to decide between your own treating physician and the company's.
01-23-2008, 01:22 AM
......2) management gets moved around all the time and I just recently heard that this particular jerk is being moved to a different center in less than 2 weeks
Yay! Hang on for two more weeks! There is a light at the end of the tunnel! :woohoo: