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View Full Version : to say something or not?


princess
03-29-2008, 11:13 PM
OK heres the story. I live with two other roomates in an apartment and one of the girls has two cats (long haired by the way). i was never informed before we moved in that there would be cats, but i dealt with it. Then one of the cats is always scratching at doors and will bolt out the front door any chance she gets and it drives me nuts. Well a dilemma started when the two cats decided they wanted to kill each other, my roommate got the un-spayed one spayed hoping it would help, but it hasnt. A result of this is a disgusting litterbox in the middle of our living room(one cat in her room one out) and it stinks and its gross and i dont know what she plans to do. I do not want to live with a litterbox in my living room, but i dont know what to say. I hate conflict, and i know this isnt her fault or what she wanted to happen but im going nuts! My other roomate has cats at her parents house and is a cat lover and even she hates this one that we have to put up with.
i feel like i have already dealt with enough, keeping my door shut all the time so they get free range while i have to stay cooped up in my shut room, chasing the cat down the main apartment hall, dealing with the long hair and smelliness i just feel like enough is enough, but i dont know what to do! :wall: :pout:

saracidaltendencies
03-29-2008, 11:18 PM
I think you should bring it up, but, in a way that won't cause conflict...Maybe say something like you fear what may happen to the cat because of him/her getting out, and, talk to her about relocating the litterbox. Is there a spare room, or a spot in the kitchen that it could be moved to?

vaknitter
03-29-2008, 11:29 PM
HMM - so I know nothing about cats other than I am allergic so this girl and her cats would have been out the door before they got in. I would so say something about the litterbox in the living room !! UGH How long has she had the cats and how old are they? Any chance she would let one of htem go to a good home?

cftwo
03-30-2008, 09:23 AM
Princess, has she then separated the two cats and that's why there's a litter box in the living room? In my opinion, there are a few options

1) send one of the cats home (or find another home for him/her) since the two cats don't get along
2) keep up with litter patrol. It's one thing if a litter box is in a basement or a garage, but a living room litter box needs to be kept clean. She could also get one of those covered boxes, which cuts down on the smell (at least for humans). In my opinion, this is non-negotiable. If there must be a litter box in the living room, there must be a CLEAN litter box in the living room.
3) the cat bolting out the front door is a safety issue for the cat. If the cats are fighting and this one wants out, my guess is that there's a territorial issue going on. There simply isn't enough room for the two cats to each have their own space. Separating the cats or finding a bigger place for them to live would probably help here. Also, if this cat is anything like one of mine, that cat might be itching for a scent of spring - if you have nice strong screens on the windows, open a window for a while and let the cat smell the great outdoors. My cats have been feeling cooped up lately, and I'm hoping the weather warms up enough to open the windows soon, at least for a while.

I would talk to your roommate about the litter situation and about finding a way for the cats to be happy, because it sure sounds like what's happening isn't working for them or for you.

Silver
03-30-2008, 11:10 AM
The litter box in the living room would be enough for me to go nuts. That's unacceptable IMHO. If she HAS to separate the boxes, for crying out loud, the two cats should not be living in the same place. Period. One cat needs to go, and on top of that, the litter box for the remaining cat should be in her bedroom, nowhere else. It's HER cat, HER litter box. :!!!:

Cynamar
03-30-2008, 11:25 AM
I think you should definitely say something. You should not be living with a litter box in the living room and should not be expected to chase her cat down every time the door is opened. The whole situation is ridiculous. I don't know how you stand it. Is the gal this inconsiderate with other issues?

knitasha
03-30-2008, 12:50 PM
I hate conflict, and i know this isnt her fault or what she wanted to happen but im going nuts! My other roomate has cats at her parents house and is a cat lover and even she hates this one that we have to put up with. I just feel like enough is enough, but i dont know what to do! :wall: :pout:

Excuse me, but in what way is it not her fault? She brings two badly-behaved cats into a shared apartment without consulting her roommates; makes the main living space uninhabitable; and forces the other two rent-payers to hide out in their rooms.

She caused the situation and she is responsible for fixing it. Nobody enjoys conflict, but this doesn't have to be a big emotional deal. If you don't feel you can bring up the issue on your own, enlist your other roommate to do it with you. Make it clear to her that she must get rid of the litter box in the living room and keep her cats under control. You can be civilized about it, but you should be firm. Give her a deadline (two weeks?) to take care of the problem or move out, cats and all.

Good luck,
Knitasha
(cat lover)

Cynamar
03-30-2008, 12:58 PM
Amen, Sister! What she said!

Debkcs
03-30-2008, 01:11 PM
What Silver and Knitasha said, only with more exclamation marks! You should not have to put up with this mess at all.

I love cats, almost as much as I love dogs, but will not put up with the mess of a litter box anymore. You should not feel guilty about giving her a few days to work out her problem and get the litter box out!

msoebel
03-31-2008, 10:28 AM
I assume that you don't want to blame her for the situation because you like her and she is a nice person. But even nice people can be completely inconsiderate of others, and she is certainly doing that.

You didn't expect the cats, you didn't want the cats...you didn't agree to the cats.

Therefore, you shouldn't be forced to deal with the cats. At least one must go (the one whose litterbox is in the living room, would be my guess). Talk to the other roommate first, and get her on your side. Then I would just say it very nicely, "I know you didn't think this would happen, but it has. You need to find another home for this cat. You can't be a good owner if you have to keep them separated, and it must be stressful for you...I know it's been stressful for us. Where can you find a home for it?"

And give her a time frame that you expect the cat to be gone.

Hildegard_von_Knittin
03-31-2008, 10:44 AM
How does the other non-cat-owning roomate feel about the situation? Maybe you two could have a nice, friendly, non-threatening come to jesus meeting with the other... it will help you to feel like you have some backup. Just don' gang up on her!

VictoiseC
04-05-2008, 05:45 PM
There is like NO WAY I would have a litter box in the living room. That's just gross gross gross. If one is in a bathroom, can't another be in a back room or... do you have two bathrooms? It's not fair to you. We keep ours in the bathtub and empty it immediately when our 2 cats use it. well, almost immediately (have to see it first):teehee: