You know...sometimes when we are so focused on ourselves, it helps to do something for someone else. Perhaps you could volunteer somewhere and ask her to come along. Doing for others has a way of putting things into perspective. You also gain confidence when those you are helping express appreciation for your efforts. I experienced this when I began volunteering at my children's elementary school.
Joy comes in serving and helps us subconsciously realize that maybe we aren't as bad off as we thought. Volunteering might illuminate some hidden talents and grow her confidence in that way.
Just a few thoughts...off the top of my head.