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Old 08-23-2008, 04:55 AM   #6
susi
Turning the Heel
 
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Originally Posted by auburnchick View Post
You know...sometimes when we are so focused on ourselves, it helps to do something for someone else. Perhaps you could volunteer somewhere and ask her to come along. Doing for others has a way of putting things into perspective. You also gain confidence when those you are helping express appreciation for your efforts. I experienced this when I began volunteering at my children's elementary school.

Joy comes in serving and helps us subconsciously realize that maybe we aren't as bad off as we thought. Volunteering might illuminate some hidden talents and grow her confidence in that way.

Just a few thoughts...off the top of my head.

i would try auburnchicks idea to start with personally. i used to be a lot like that, i went from bad relationship to worse once because i thought i didnt deserve any better. it took for me to do something drastic to sort my life out.

it sounds like she just needs a kick up the butt kind of thing, but a nice one rather than you will do as i say kinda. voulentering could be a great confide,nce builder, a great first step on the ladder. even going back to school or something like that to make her meet new people and feel good about herself.

I actually walked away from a friend after 2 years of her being in an abusive relationship (phsyically abusive) because i helped her walk away 3 times and she just kept going back saying she loved him!!
but she may not want to be helpped. just prepare yourself for that, some people are just like that. my mum is kinda like it being honest.

good luck, you are a great friend trying to help her
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