I originally learned to knit to prove to myself that I could. I didn't think I had a creative bone in my body. As it turned out, I am a lot more creative than I have myself credit for, and I was soon quite addicted. Not only was it something to do, but it produced results!
Then, I ended up taking over a year off. On December 19, 2007, my life as I knew it changed in a very significant way. My 19 year old sister was murdered. On December 23, her ex boyfriend (father to her 2 year old son) was arrested for her murder. My sister had recently started letting the ex have overnight visitation with their son. She went December 19 to pick him up (it was the first time she'd ever gone alone), and she never arrived back home to my mom's house. The ex had punched her so hard in the face that he knocked her out, then he fashioned a ligature out of shoelaces and strangled her so hard that she had a half inch "ligature furrow" in her neck. To hide his crime, he put her body in her car, drove it to a nearby city, and set it on fire. My two year old nephew was now left wtihout a mommy, and a few days later, without a daddy. Life was turned upside down.
I didn't have the energy for life. It took all I had to wake up every day and go to work...to just LIVE. I was also planning my wedding at the time. So, life was just hectic and I was just tired.
The murderer's trial began in October, 2008. I picked up the needles when jury selection began. I found myself full of anxiety to the point where I just felt like jumping out of my skin--I didn't know what to do with myself! Knitting helped calm my mind and helped "turn off" all of the over thinking I was doing. It was very helpful in the week ahead as I attended every single day of the trial, which was emotionally and mentally exhausting. Knitting was my therapy, and it was healing...it helped me ease my anxiety and depression, and it helped me calm my mind enough to actually sleep at night.
Now I'm back to enjoying the process and enjoying what I create. Kntting helped save me, I think. It's helping me to move on and live again, which is what my sister would've wanted.