I still couldn't find that darn end, so I just cut the yarn on the outside. I had to do that once before when I frogged the button bands (it started out as a cardi). What I found both times was that when I cut the outside and pulled, I was unraveling the 2nd row. DOH. I had to pull it through like a snake, then detach the (still intact) castoff, and THEN I could really start frogging. What a PITA! But the frogging went okay, and now I have a GIANT ball of yarn. I went back to just above the ribbing. The pattern is knitted straight down, but I smartly thought I would put in 2 decrease rows to make it fit better around the waist.
Well didn't that have the opposite effect! That will teach me to modify a pattern. So I removed the decreases and will do a little extra stockinette before going back to the ribbing (on the same size needles this time). I emailed my LYS owner to see if I can get some more of the yarn. She must think I am nuts as this sweater should have been finished long ago and I've used about an acre of yarn so far.

I had 8.5" of both ribbing and 8.5" of stockinette. Maybe I'll do more like 12 of stockinette and only 5 or 6 of ribbing.