I know what you mean. When I first joined Ravelry, I got my feelings hurt so bad that I almost left, but then I decided not to deprive myself of a wonderful source of information, patterns, and interesting tips, just because of a few hateful people. I just had to amend how I used ravelry, learn which groups seem to be the most welcoming, and not post if a thread gets heated. Since then, I haven't had any problems. I figure if someone just wants to be nasty, I feel sorry for them.
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Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew as steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10