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Old 02-28-2006, 11:01 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by doglover
There are so many things in our lives that are up in the air that it wouldn't make sense to start trying, but then I think, what if it takes us years to conceive? (I have endometriosis) And then I suffer from migraines and my hubby is type 1 diabetic. These also make me wonder if we should have kids. I wouldn't in a million years wish a migraine on my worst enemy let alone my own child. And then my hubby worries about passing the diabetes also. And I also realize that there is no guarantee that they would get either of those, sigh, I am really over-thinking this whole thing.
This is part of the reason my bf and I have decided not to have kids once we are married. My family has a major history of alcoholism, depression, and various minor other traits. My mom is a recovering alcoholic, was diagnosed with bi-polar a year or so ago, and a few years before that was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. My dad's side also has alcoholism, depression, and my dad's dad died of heart problems.
Growing up I already know I've got issues with depression, and I'm worried about the bi-polar thing...if one day it just busts out like it did with my mom. Same with the fibro. It's a terrible terrible thing to live with. And researching it has led me to believe I may have that as well. So, just knowing -my- history, I was worried about passing any/all of that to my kids.
My bf is adopted, so we don't really know what his blood carries. Which kind of makes it worse. I'd rather know, so we could determine if it's worth it.
Originally Posted by doglover
I mean, raising kids in this day in age (who says that anymore!) just the thought of it scares the crap out of me. You wouldn't believe the thoughts I've had, oy vey. I guess I just needed to vent to you to help me sort some of it out.
The other part of why we decided not to is because of the world and society. I don't have any hope that the world will ever be a better place then what it is now, and frankly that thought terrifies me. If this is as good as it's going to be...
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In the end we decided that the health risks and the way the world is going is not a good place for children to be raised in.
Additionally, we both agree there are far far too many people in the world. Of course, on the other hand, part of me wants to so that we could have a smart kid to try to keep the balance on all the idiots out there breeding like rabbits. (Not saying they are idiots for having lots of kids. Just that there are a lot of stupid people in the world.)
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I realize I'm going against what most people have said here, but I'm just sharing my 2 cents.
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Don't get me wrong. I'd -love- to have a baby. I've always wanted the big preggie belly to rub and use as a resting spot for a glass of juice or something while I'm watching tv. And to watch my little boy or girl run around and know that I created that. It makes my heart gush at the thought of it.
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We're both young yet (I'm 22, he's 24) but I plan on getting my tubes tied as soon as I can afford it. If, later on in life, we decide we made a mistake and wish we had had a child, there's -always- the option for adoption. And I'm all about helping animals and people that are already here and need as much help as they can get.
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The fact that I don't have kids may be part of the reason I'm thinking the way I am, but it doesn't change the fact that there's other options out there.
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Yes, our bodies are telling us we need to procreate. But I think it's more of a instinctual need to ensure the species survives than anything else.
And honestly, I think there are too many people out there as it is.
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Sorry this got so lengthy. Didn't mean to turn it into a long post. Just wanted to get another perspective in the lot.
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