Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-12-2007, 03:56 PM   #1
stitchwitch
Working the Gusset
 
stitchwitch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Tampa area, FL and Gatlinburg, TN
Posts: 1,184
Thanks: 189
Thanked 201 Times in 179 Posts
Rude or not rude
My husband turned 50 in March, my parents sent a card, no gift, no money. We were totally cool with that, they are retired and to be honest we didn't expect them to do anything.
I turned 40 this past Saturday, my parents sent a card and I expected it to be the same thing as when my husband's birthday came around except this time my mom stuffed a $40.00 check in the card. I could tell my husband felt a little odd, not necessarily at the gift aspect because we don't need the money but at the fact that my parents send me money and not him. I feel weird too, in my opinion it's kind of rude. Thoughts.
__________________
stitchwitch is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:00 PM   #2
sinistral_needler
Knitting the Flap
 
sinistral_needler's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Kimberly, WI
Posts: 436
Thanks: 95
Thanked 51 Times in 47 Posts
Send a message via Yahoo to sinistral_needler
Well, is this a normal birthday gift from your parents or did they send you the gift knowing that your DH's parents didn't send a gift? Do the sets of parents have a history of being competitive against each other?

I would say don't take it too seriously and enjoy a nice dinner out with DH.

Edit: Oops, I misread the post. I would say that since you turned the big 4-0, that is really why they sent the check, since it can be a bit of a milestone birthday!
__________________
Tracy
http://sinistral-needler.blogspot.com/

"Do whatever {Jesus} tells you to." ~ John 2:5
OTN: Nashua simple ribbed scarf, Seeded Cable Cardigan for Mom, washcloths, Rainy Day Scarf
OTH: baby bobble afghan, shells afghan
sinistral_needler is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:02 PM   #3
Mariblue
Working the Gusset
 
Mariblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,246
Thanks: 188
Thanked 343 Times in 328 Posts
Have they sent presents/checks to him in the past?
I'd have a nice dinner out with the hubbie, too.
Mariblue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:02 PM   #4
kemp
Grafting the Toe
 
kemp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Cincinnati, Ohio
Posts: 4,681
Thanks: 81
Thanked 107 Times in 84 Posts
Send a message via ICQ to kemp Send a message via AIM to kemp Send a message via Yahoo to kemp
I don't really think that's out of line (since you're their daughter). I'm sure they didn't intend for it to be insulting or rude to your DH...probably didn't even occur to them that it could be taken the wrong way.
kemp is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:06 PM   #5
stitchwitch
Working the Gusset
 
stitchwitch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Tampa area, FL and Gatlinburg, TN
Posts: 1,184
Thanks: 189
Thanked 201 Times in 179 Posts
Hubby's parents are deceased so no rivalry there.
They have sent money and gifts to me occasionally, but never hubby or at least not for years.
I was thinking of just going out to dinner with it, that way it won't be so weird.
__________________
stitchwitch is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:11 PM   #6
Mariblue
Working the Gusset
 
Mariblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,246
Thanks: 188
Thanked 343 Times in 328 Posts
Originally Posted by stitchwitch View Post
Hubby's parents are deceased so no rivalry there.
They have sent money and gifts to me occasionally, but never hubby or at least not for years.
I was thinking of just going out to dinner with it, that way it won't be so weird.
Well, than I would say that it's normal for them, and I wouldn't worry. Just share it with your hubby, it'll all work out.
Mariblue is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:07 PM   #7
Sharly
Turning the Heel
 
Sharly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 969
Thanks: 200
Thanked 120 Times in 119 Posts
I wouldn't be too offended by it...naturally, your birthday is more meaningful to them - don't let little things like this affect your relationship with your parents. You won't have them for forever...
__________________
Sharly
www.houseof9lives.wordpress.com
Sharly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:23 PM   #8
iza
Turning the Heel
 
iza's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Montreal, Canada
Posts: 946
Thanks: 53
Thanked 222 Times in 178 Posts
It's not that strange to me either. You are their daughter, it makes sense if they're on a limited budget to give you a gift and not your husband.

However, I'm not a gift-oriented person AT ALL. I way prefer to do an activity with family and friends than buy a gift for a specific occasion. There's always so much politics around gifts... I hate it! And it defeats the whole purpose!
__________________
iza on ravelry!
My not so popular BLOG
iza is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 04:47 PM   #9
PurlyGyrl
Working the Gusset
 
PurlyGyrl's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: 3 Exits Past NoWhere
Posts: 1,217
Thanks: 170
Thanked 321 Times in 305 Posts
I am with the others--not too strange since YOU are their daughter--maybe they didn't think (parents have a way of doing that you know ) Or maybe since it was a milestone birthday-40-and they sent your 40 bucks, maybe they thought they were being clever.
__________________
Happy Knitting!
Purly a/k/a Denise

I'm PurlyGyrl on Ravelry, too!
I just don't know how to do that button thing
My favorite blue eyed guy
PurlyGyrl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2007, 05:09 PM   #10
marykz
Working the Gusset
 
marykz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Maryland
Posts: 1,538
Thanks: 270
Thanked 279 Times in 238 Posts
my Dad always says I owe my Mom a gift on my birthday- without her, I wouldn't have one!!! LOL!

but seriously- that is status quo here: I get cards and small gifts from in laws, more meaningfull stuff from my folks. the DH gets meaningfull stuff from his parents, and mine give him cards and a starbucks gift card.

just my 2 cents.
__________________
did I say one project at a time?

marykz is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Rude Salespeople evona The Lounge 9 07-25-2009 11:42 AM
Rude clerks & wwyd Knit4Pie The Lounge 26 08-13-2008 01:46 PM
Is it rude to knit at a business meeting/workshop? Jackie M. General Knitting 2 02-21-2006 10:41 PM
knitting during lectures..rude or acceptable? Cristy General Knitting 85 02-13-2006 11:37 PM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:01 AM.