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Old 01-15-2013, 09:33 AM   #21
Antares
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Originally Posted by Jan in CA View Post
My two cents and alternate opinion-

Some people get busy and don't send out thank you notes quickly especially with a baby. I didn't get some out to my MIL once within a week when my kids were a baby and toddler and she sent me a scathing letter. I know I should have done it sooner, but it's not like I was sitting on the couch eating bonbons.

Kohls is not an expensive store and some people just like to have new stuff for their baby. Apparently the thank you is important so give her a call or email. I would donate the blanket, too.
Only problem is she hasn't had the baby yet, so that excuse doesn't fly. The slowness in sending a thank you note (or even sending an e-mail or calling) is understandable to a point, but not opening the gift for a week (which shows disregard and a definite lack of interest) is inexcusable! Yeah, tell her to send it back!
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Old 01-15-2013, 11:01 AM   #22
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If she hasn't even opened it yet, she may well be too busy though. One can't say whether she's disinterested.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:05 PM   #23
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Haven't figured out how to click on the "thanks" but thanks for all the replies. I have both communicated with cousin through email and via phone about other things. Not another mention from her or daughter. I am giving blanket to Project Linus. I do know a few people who have appreciated what I made and they are still on my list to make things for but aside from them and myself, any other knitting will be for charity purposes.
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Old 01-22-2013, 04:43 PM   #24
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take a look at the four little boxes below each post ...
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Old 01-31-2013, 04:36 PM   #25
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I knitted a pair of Baby Jane shoes for a friends daughter a few years back and gave them to her. She replied. Oh, thanks, turned around and walked off. She did not open it or show any interest in the gift. I felt deflated. I never received a thank you note, email, phone call, or anything to state if she ever opened it, let alone if she liked it or if they even fit the baby. Her mother never mentioned them either. I did a very good job on them too. The shoes weren't a big gift, but still they took several hours to make plus the cost of materials. I think expecting SOMETHING in return is not to much to ask, pregnancy hormones or not. Rude is just... RUDE!
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Old 02-05-2013, 11:34 AM   #26
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I was guilty of assuming knitting was done in a flash. After I actually began knitting I learned how wrong I was. It takes care effort and attention in each and every stitch. Anything that someone has taken their time to knit as a gift should be enjoyed because a lot of work went into it.

If there are people who do not appreciate your efforts I say let it slide, but then again don't waste future efforts if the finished garment won't be appreciated.
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Old 02-08-2013, 03:46 PM   #27
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I think that we need to remember that when we marry into a family they have their "culture" and perhaps the things we think is a bit weird or disrespectful is not to them.

Case in point...my sister in law use to make little biting remarks about the gifts I made for her children for Christmas. She thought "handmade" was "cheap". Maybe they were to her...but to MY family handmade was NOT considered cheap and was considered precious because you thought about the gift receiver while making the item. I struggled with this...getting especially "offended" when she told me that "it only takes a few dollars to buy some little something for the kids". I thought WHY would I waste a few dollars on cheap little toys that would break or not even be liked by the child?

I ended up telling her it took much more than that to make the items...and that with every stitch I thought about giving this to the child. I also told her that MY family didn't even give Christmas Gifts...and if we did give a gift for other occasions it had to be a USEFUL gift. I told her that I could not give a gift unless it was "useful" because it was "wasteful and I felt guilty. Sorry but that was how I was raised I told her.

She backed off and stopped the biting remarks. She accepted my "culture" and I accepted hers in that I gave gifts on Christmas because it was important for her. We ended up getting along just fine once I got the issue off my chest. She just didn't understand.

I would suggest taking your MIL to a really nice local yarn store with all the expensive yarns and talk about how much you like this one but it would take 8 skeins at X amount of dollars...and just say well maybe one day...when it is on sale for half price or something like that.

She'll start to appreciate the cost of knitting garments after seeing all that beautiful yarn colors and the beautiful prices. LOL! You'll impress her with your frugal nature (let her believe you would only buy such yarn if it on sale). You'll catch her artistic senses...and she will relate yarn colors to paint supplies (which aren't cheap either).

BTW...I agree with others...IF she gives you something she makes for you...don't offer to pay for it. That would insult me. IF she brings you the yarn...or she says, "I'd like to pick out some yarn for a poncho, lets g shopping...will you help me ? then by all means let her pay for it.

As a MIL myself I have had to deal with a DIL that has a very different interpretation of what a gift should be. I do give gifts at Christmas to my sons and their families despite my elderly parents not approving of this whole Christmas gifts to anyone past 17 years of age. BUT, I give what I am comfortable giving and leave her to accept me as I am. LOL! (I don't know why she doesn't appreciate emergency earthquake kits or kitchen tools...but that's her problem, not mine).
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Old 02-08-2013, 04:25 PM   #28
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tangrene, well said.
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