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Old 06-18-2006, 02:54 PM   #1
TwoLeftNeedles
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OT: Ever had a REALLY bad year?
This isn't a plea for sympathy or advice. You don't have to think of anything nice or helpful to say. I'm just hoping that by putting a few things down in print the emotional pressures within will ease up a little.

DS7 was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. The school and I got pretty sick of seeing each other this year. BUT -- I focused on how high functioning he is, how fortunate we are to have worked out our marriage issues before this hit us, how lucky we can afford to get him help, and how generous the response was on this forum that lead us to some really good help.

Then DH's cluster headaches came out of remission and he had to be out of work for two, almost three, months. BUT -- focused on the fact that we recovered some of the lost income through short-term disability, and thanked God for the Family and Medical Leave Act that kept him from losing his job entirely.

Now, at the ripe old age of 47, I am told I have Parkinson's Disease.

I absolutely cannot fall apart. DH panics if I'm anxious or unhappy -- for him to be able to help me, I have to stay calm, optomistic and assured. I don't want to be a sad sack with a litany of woes to recite every time someone asks, "How are you?" The soap opera of my life just isn't that interesting to someone not living it.

In fact, unless I decide to pay someone to listen to me feel sorry for myself, I can't think of a soul it would benefit.

So why am I telling you? Because I felt compelled to tell SOMEBODY, and you have the advantage of being able to escape with the click of a mouse button without having to worry about seeming rude.
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Old 06-18-2006, 03:10 PM   #2
Ingrid
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What else is there to say? :(
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Old 06-18-2006, 03:15 PM   #3
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First-- MAJOR hugs for you!!!

And---
This is the place to come for a shoulder and a ready ear. I have had some really crappy years (decades) and I wish this forum had been around for them. Everybody here would probably hate me, but oh well.

Is DH back at work? Do you have a treatment plan for the Parkinson's, or are you in the early stages of investigation?

Keep your chin up, don't be afraid to ask for sympathy or advice.
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Old 06-18-2006, 03:30 PM   #4
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(((((hugs))))) My grandmother had Parkinson's Disease. I know that they are making advances all the time and I hope and pray that they find a cure very, very soon.

I'm with Sara in offering you my shoulder or ear whenever you need it!
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Old 06-18-2006, 04:21 PM   #5
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I'm sorry
I'm so sorry for your bad year. Take one day at a time and put one foot in front of the other and you will get through it.

I have arthritis and I hurt every day with it and some days are worse then others. Sometimes having a quick cry helps me. I have a strong faith in Jesus so I talk to Him about it and I take one day at a time.

May God Bless you and your family .
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Old 06-18-2006, 05:38 PM   #6
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Thanks for your kindness, ladies. Celine, faith is my greatest joy.

I 'overdid it' at the computer one day almost a year ago and ended up with an aching shoulder. I assumed that if I laid off the mouse and stuff, it would get better. My husband and I made a marriage retreat a month later which involved a lot of writing, and I blamed my lack of progress on that. Mom was convinced it was knitting that was keeping me from healing.

By Thanksgiving family were commenting on the tremor I'd developed in my right arm. I'd also lost the ability to write legibly. My husband kept nagging me to go to the doctor, but I would say that a doctor would just tell me not to use the arm til it healed, and I could do that myself.

At Christmas a dear friend visited, and she said she'd had repetitive strain injuries that felt similar and showed me some stretches that her physical therapist had given her. They helped with the pain somewhat.

It wasn't untili April that we had DS's situation at school somewhat under control and DH's cluster headache bout was starting to wind down enough for him to resume work. I decided I could sneak a doc's visit in for myself. The doctor didn't like the tremor and referred me to a neurologist. I finally got in to see one on Thursday this week.

The neurologist thinks I had the cart before the horse.. that it was actually the beginnings of rgidity from Parkinson's that set my shoulder up to be injured. Now, of course, I flash back to wondering wny it was hard to manipulate the mouse with normal speed and precision (blame the cordless mouse), and how annoyed I was with my blurry vision that a new prescription didn't help with (blame dry eyes from computer use) -- both subtle warning signs of Parkinson's.

In the end, I have two options:

1.- Have Parkinson's and wallow in misery, or
2.- Have Parkinson's and make the best of it

As not having Parkinson's isn't an option, it only makes sense to choose the second (even if I did take a moment there to wallow in it).

I feel a bit like Blanche DuBois -- depending on the kindness of strangers. Your gifts of caring mean much. You gift not only me, but those around me have their burden of support eased a little bit as well.
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Old 06-18-2006, 06:11 PM   #7
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I'm so sorry to hear about your rough year and your challenging diagnosis! It sounds to me like you've already proved your strength and grace when dealing with life's curve-balls, and I imagine they are going to stand you in good stead as you develop plans and strategies for living with Parkinson's.

Keep venting (I'd call it "coping aloud") and I (and I'm sure many others) will keep sending up good thoughts for you.
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Old 06-18-2006, 06:24 PM   #8
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Old 06-18-2006, 07:22 PM   #9
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It isn't easy to be the one who has to keep the stiff optimistic upper lip in the family. I am that person too, so I sympathize. But here you can lean on us all and let us be the optimistics!
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Old 06-18-2006, 07:24 PM   #10
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I'm so glad that you came here to chat about this, we are friends here
I'm so sorry that life hasn't been so peachy this year. Please know that I am praying for you and your family...I am here to chat anytime that you wish.
I'm also happy to see that your disposition is so good, that's marvelous, and, speaking from experience (I'm 47 and have been disabled for 20 years) I will tell you that having a good attitude and faith (especially faith) will see you thru the rough spots. Please don't hesitate to pm or email me should you feel like it...you are in my prayers
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