I am so very sorry for your loss. I wish you much peace and comfort in the following weeks and months.
I have to add that I so wish I had lived on a farm. My dad used to work with a guy who had a lot of cows and we went to see his farm one day and I was amazed at how they responded to him, but with our family there they sure were a bit leary
I thought they were just beautiful creatures I always want to go and pet them but am a bit scared at their size. Maybe someday I'll work up the courage.
Again, I wish you the best.