ok, in a nutshell
Did I tell you about when my daughter told me I needed to write her a check for the remainder of her SS check each month, because she wanted to invest it, and was charging me with Fraud for spending it on her sisters (in her mind, on myself, and my LAVISH lifestyle)
well, on Friday I got notified by SS that she had her entire SS check redirected to the woman she lives with. They both informed me this was what happens when i say NO to a "reasonable" request on her part, and since she is living there, I do not have ANY claim to her money (now remember I am putting her residual in her savings account, since she made her "demand")
Yes, everyone, I have verbally revoked the POA for the woman who is "helping us reconcile" and informed them both my daughter is not allowed to live there anymore per her ONE AND ONLY guardian, ME. The woman is refusing to return her Passport, SS card, and Birth Cert, Claims they are not mine to demand. I am making the 'request' FORMAL, in writing.
This woman is involved in some VERY sketchy actions, NOT in supporting our reconciliation as a family (as the original agreement was). So I cannot trust her with my child, I have had concerns for a while (nothing to too big, but nagging stuff that can be argued might be just 'paranoia'), but this is a HUGE thing.
It is not the Money, although the lack will hurt her sisters (and me) somewhat. In ways the kids will notice a LOT, not so much in the things that really matter. I already set into motion to sell a BUNCH of stuff on Ebay (I will tell you what is for sale here too if that is ok) and I have hired a woman to help declutter the house, and help us keep it that way.
I am making a Hunny Do List for myself, if I do not get them done I cannot Knit at night. Its kidda Funny (funny odd, not funny Haha) that her sisters have been MUCH happier lately, even with her Crazy inappropriate behaviors, and them intentionally backing away from time with her.
I gave her the option of moving home ( she will NEVER do that) or in with my sister, who has offered, BUT has 3 kids 6 and under, one with special needs. today I needed to call her to help with my kids due to a MAJOR car problem (somehow all of it was free by the end of the Car Shop visit
). I have Jumped through a BUNCH of hoops to keep her needs met, despite her unwillingness to allow anything to work the way I hope.
I have been crying off an on since Friday, my other two kids are scared, they do not (totally) know what is wrong, and each time I try to give them some little nugget of an explanation, I get SO overwhelmed by sadness and fear, it scares them more. $30 for dinner and School lunch, is gonna become the extravagance, instead of the cheep way of doing things.
Knitting is not a help right now, it is just an avoidance technique and I am just flying by the seat of my pants. I am NOT going to give up on her, but I do not have a lot of reserves to Fight with her.
I had a dream about this, My Father came to have a cup of tea, he asked how things were going, i told him it was hard, but I was dealing. He just LOOKED at me, and asked if I was Sure. I woke up crying so hard. He loved/s her SOOO much, and he is not here to help me with this. My Mother is not well enough to help, she wants to, she will try, but she is not 'there' enough right now. My Brother wants to help her so much she will be able to manipulate him a bit to easily (IMHO) and My Sister has a LOT on her plate right now, an acting out teen is NOT gonna be any kind of positive in her life.
Sorry to be SO tangential, but it is hard to share this