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Old 06-20-2008, 05:34 PM   #11
Turning the Heel
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i've told her tonight that i am going to say something, shes ok with it now shes thought about it properly. it was a bit of a shock when i found out it was gone.

she just wants to make sure everyone is protected right now until we are at the point i can take over his role (thats is happening in august time).

he's not home for over a week, i will say something then so he knows i know he took it.

thanks for your opinios, i just didnt know what i should do as he's my brother. anyone else i would have just had it out with them straight away
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Old 06-20-2008, 10:07 PM   #12
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Hmm, maybe put a note in the jewelry box and the next time he opens it expecting to find money, well, he'll have a little note from you hide the money elsewhere and definitely confront him. Family or not, what he's doing is wrong and it needs to stop. That is YOUR money in YOUR house and he has no right to steal it from you.
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Old 06-21-2008, 09:00 AM   #13
Turning the Heel
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I agree tell him you know and see what happens. Ya he is going to say he didn't but at least he will know he had been discovered.
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Old 06-21-2008, 11:02 AM   #14
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You know your brother better than me but I would play a little bit of a trick on him. INstead of confronting him about it just causually walk up and begin a conversation about the borrowed money. Maybe say something about how soon your son is to take his trip and what he will be using it for and when you will need it back. LOL, This tactic works for my BF on so many people I'm going to try it next time someone treats me like crap. He will hopefully see who he hurt and feel a bit guilty. Then he will at least learn from his actions without you breaking any family ties. You will have handled it in a cool fashion without causing a huge fuss but still letting him know he hurt you and your son. IN any case, You will feel better. he may return the money and he may not. If he doesn't he may need some serious help. This could be a sign of a larger problem if he is stealing from others as well. I wish you all the best!
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Old 06-21-2008, 01:11 PM   #15
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I KNOW how u feel........
When my brother was a teenager he did that ALL THE TIME. In addition to stealing my $ he even faked 2 robberies in my 2 former houses to pawn a laptop and other stuff. Sad huh...He actually got spray paint and painted every wall on 3 floors of the houses to make it look "real" enough for the cops......i'd clobber him over the head for sure!!!! He has no right to take your money!
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Old 06-21-2008, 07:18 PM   #16
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Elmore Leonard wrote a Quote my dXh loved to quote in his D&A group sessions
"a Drunk may steal your money, but a Junkie will steal your wallet, then help you look for it"

its an excellent example of peoples levels of dishonesty. I am a person who tries VERY hard to put trust in people, even when i do not trust them in my heart. People do not understand so I just pretend, and deal with the fear/anxiety quietly.

I am not saying your brother has a substance abuse issue, but with your moms knee jerk reaction, it seems he has some type of lack of guilt thing going on. Did you say he was younger?
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Old 06-22-2008, 06:04 AM   #17
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heather, omg thats terrible. i hope he got some help for that. i must admit i'd kill him of he did that to mer as well

ecb, no he's 30 i, october!! no teenage etc excuses. he should know better!! he does know stealings wrong, and would never ever do it outside family (he used my dads business bank card and wracked up a €500 bill last weekend on dvds and itunes!!).

i will leave a note in the jewellery box i think saying i know who took the money etc, and i have said to mum that i am going to say infront of him to her that i was planning to buy medication for my hosrse withit (kinda true, i do have to buy it just not with that money).

just looking forward to when i move out now. no more of this kinda crap. i thought it would be ds doing stuff like that until he understood not my 30 year old brother!!!

thanks for the ideas though


but then he goes and buys ds a whole load opf new toys and clotes with some of the pinched money. i cant win!
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Old 06-22-2008, 11:44 AM   #18
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You bet I'd confront him. You might not get your money back, but at least he knows you are aware of it being gone.
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